eli. 😎

🏈🏃

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

ೃ࿐✧ଂ٠· 𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐣𝐚𝐡 𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧.

❛ 𝒊'𝒎 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒈𝒖𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒈𝒆𝒕𝒔 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒖𝒑. ❜

↻ + ♡ ?

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

omg i thought she left me on read aha

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

+ wished he could send and then delete them.

lying on the field, he falls into the habit again.

> i miss u

delete.

> i wish it wasn't awkward

delete.

> i miss being your friend.

sent. ✅

his heart stops, eyes widening in horror.

“wait, wait, wait, no ! shit, no. fuuuck.”

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

over the past few months, eli had gotten into a rather sad habit - he'd open up abbie's contact in his phone, stare for a bit at the last messages they'd exchanged . . . awkward, stilted, telling of the state of their breakup at the end. sometimes, he'd type messages he +

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

to be a cute pool noodle

[‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍* m @venenarivs]

why would a pool noodle have scrunchies on it?

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

☹️

[‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍* m @venenarivs]

no, no it wasn't.

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

that was a good guess, though, right ?

[‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍* m @venenarivs]

no 🫶🏻

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

oh. haha, yeah ! i agree.

[𝑩𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒆𝒏 𝑫𝒖𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕-𝑬𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒕 @madetcperform]

no, because women go through too much shit and having men being assholes shouldn't also be on the list

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

you love them because their birth control hurts ?

[𝑩𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒆𝒏 𝑫𝒖𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕-𝑬𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒕 @madetcperform]

and that's why love women.

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

duuude. that looks like it hurts. 😔

[𝑩𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒆𝒏 𝑫𝒖𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕-𝑬𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒕 @madetcperform]

there ya go

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

pool noodle

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

birth . . . c . . .

wait.

. . .

( begins looking mildly horrified. )

[𝑩𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒆𝒏 𝑫𝒖𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕-𝑬𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒕 @madetcperform]

that's an iud, it's a birth control thing.

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

( idk what this is but it's making him think of d*ck )

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

yeah !

[𝑩𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒆𝒏 𝑫𝒖𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕-𝑬𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒕 @madetcperform]

you know the t shaped object?

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

( squints. )

iud what ?

[𝑩𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒆𝒏 𝑫𝒖𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕-𝑬𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒕 @madetcperform]

. . . you called an iud a tampon.

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

( wait, if these are tampons, what the hell was that other thing ? )

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

i have friends that are girls, a sister, a mom, an aunt, a grandma -

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

you see it, bro ?

[⋆˚࿔ 𝚕𝚘𝚐𝚊𝚗 𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚝𝚜𝚘𝚗. @BigfootsBully]

( NODS VIGOROUSLY. )

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

oh, gross

[eli. 😎 @obscuredjock]

a bunch of those hamster wheels glued together