Octopi Wall Street

8 arms, 2 eyes, 1 siphon, 99 percent.

Not an official account of OWS. Or an octopus.

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

It's great that @elonmusk has started labeling media organizations as "state-affiliated" or "government-funded". I look forward to him doing the next logical thing and labeling the rest of them as "billionaire-owned".

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

A conservative is someone who thinks that the government taking part of your income in taxes to support public programs is intolerable tyranny, but forcing a woman to bear and raise a child she does not want is just and fair.

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

Speech isn’t free if you have to pay $44bn for it.

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

It must be crowded in Navalny’s cell, because the whole of #russia is locked up in there with him.

https://t.co/mVoeo8xdo8

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

If the Ukrainians bleed themselves dry and defeat Russia on their own land, we will applaud and claim that “we” won.

If Russia crushes their resistance and brings their country into Putin’s police state, we will shake our heads sadly and say that nothing could be done.

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

If you ever feel that you’ve heard the worst possible take on any topic, ex-president and failed coup leader Donald Trump is always there to provide a worse one.

https://t.co/oHGzFwp8KP

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

Things that are war, according to Vladimir Putin:

- economic sanctions
- considering NATO membership

Things that are not war:

- invading another country with 190,000 men and 3,000 armored fighting vehicles

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

Has NATO considered deploying forces to Ukraine and then telling Putin that they are “spontaneous self-defense groups” and “patriotic volunteers”, just like the “little green men” in the Crimea?

https://t.co/58CjJy2Roq

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

#Russia is fast on its way to becoming a really, really big North Korea, but with an older, skinnier leader and more nukes.

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

Has anyone considered just giving Putin an #nft of Ukraine, and letting him rule a virtual Ukraine in the #metaverse? That’s almost as good as having the real thing, right?

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

I don’t think this was what the Russians had in mind when they said that the Ukrainians would greet them with flowers.

https://t.co/D95Lje0LPi

#ukraine

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

“This terrible act of nautical vandalism cannot be tolerated.

We sentence this man to never have to pay for another beer for the rest of his life.”

https://t.co/KhzuREBao3

#ukraine #glugglugglug #marqueandreprisal #russianyachtgofuckyourself

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

Enjoy the great taste of delicious new "I Can't Believe It's Not Invasion™”. Now with all the horror of actual war, but with 40% less awkward moments in televised news broadcasts.

Get “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Invasion™” today & say hello to a slimmer, less accountable you.

[max seddon @maxseddon]

Russia's media censor will block any website that calls Moscow's war with Ukraine a "an, invasion, or declaration of war."

It's a "special military operation" in Donbas – or you get banned. Say Russia fired on cities and killed civilians – get banned.

https://t.co/cau7G9BuhU

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

My favorite part of the whole “Lord of the Rings” story is when Gondor calls for aid, and Theoden responds by freezing Sauron’s foreign assets and banning the Nazgûl from landing at Edoras Airport.

#ukraine #sanctions

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

Putin’s genius plan to eliminate the threat of a new NATO member country on Russia’s borders by annexing the Ukraine & adding it to Russia will, by my reckoning, give Russia THREE additional NATO members (*) on its borders.

(*) OK, Poland’s technically there already, but YKWIM.

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

It’s too bad it’s not still 1939, so we can’t get to see Trump, Carlson and Pompeo praise Hitler’s invasion of Poland as “genius” and “very savvy”.

#ukraine

https://t.co/FFTJQeUb6V

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

If you’ve ever wondered what a “well-regulated militia” looks like, take a look at Kyle Rittenhouse and it’s basically the opposite of that.

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

@Noahpinion Americans drastically overestimate the likelihood that it will happen.

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

Counterpoint: Joe Biden should “consider” nailing Donald Trump by his balls to the Washington Monument “in the best interests of the American people”.

[BBC Newsnight @BBCNewsnight]

“Donald Trump belongs in jail.”

Ex-FBI Director @Comey says while he “obviously believes” the president should be in jail, he doesn’t think “pursuing that is in the best interests of the American people”, adding Joe Biden should "consider" pardoning Donald Trump

#Newsnight

[Octopi Wall Street @octows]

The logical conclusion of the two-party system is partisanship so total that one party will double down on endorsing a coup attempt rather than admit “their guy” did anything wrong.

“We’d rather overthrow democracy than give the other side the satisfaction” is a hell of a take.