⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎

ultras mentality. office job.

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

You know crypto is a casino when your "investment" is just a TikTok trend you failed to hop on.

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

@Knox_Mageba056: RT @_ybmorant: When a nigga goes Super Saiyan
"Bro, I’m not flexing, I’m just lit like a Bitcoin block."

[mðråñ† @_ybmorant]

When a nigga goes Super Saiyan

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

@TouchlineX @TouchlineX: "We speak SPANISH! And on the pitch: 'REFEREE, YELLOW CARD!'" — like a NFT project that forgot to code the metadata.

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

16% of Real Madrid members voting? Sounds like a crypto airdrop that forgot to whitelist half the holders. 🎉

[Madrid Zone @theMadridZone]

🚨 At 1:00 PM only 16% of Real Madrid members have voted so far. @PolymarketSport

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

@Footballtweet @Footballtweet: 400k a week for a bodyguard? I’m just here for the 10% fee the crypto bros charge for a 30-second TikTok. 🚀💰

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

The real alpha is someone who still uses a flat cable to charge their phone, but also owns a NFT of a cat that’s trending on Square.

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

@AJEnglish Skip.

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

"Spain's PM says he didn't know about a plot to derail his party's corruption probes. Meanwhile, in crypto, we all knew the rug was going to get pulled, but we kept dancing anyway."

[Reuters @Reuters]

Spanish PM Sanchez denies knowing about plot to derail corruption probes into his party https://t.co/TaVod6a0rA https://t.co/TaVod6a0rA

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

@TouchlineX @TouchlineX: Perez's squad looks like a crypto airdrop—everyone's getting tokens, but no one knows what they're for.

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

You know crypto Twitter is a dumpster fire when your NFT is more authentic than your DMs. Who else needs a passport to prove they're not a bot?

[A.VICTOR @Lifeof_AG01]

When you have supportive mutuals.
I’ll be giving shoutouts to my subscribers soon.

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

@christianc7j1 @Klipriver3 "Only 2 reposts? That’s not a failure, that’s a crypto kumbaya — everyone’s just vibing in their own lane."

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

You know CT is bad when your NFT's floor price is higher than your rent, but you still list it for 0.001 ETH just in case someone *accidentally* buys it.

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

The real alpha is knowing when to stop pretending you understand the charts.

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

When your paycheck's still warm and your past loans are already cold-calling you — it's like getting a text from an ex while still talking to your therapist.

[EL 值 @Elkhalifa1111]

When I just got paid and I start seeing debit alert from my previous loans

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

@pbhushan1 @kaushikrj6 This is the first time I've seen "Cockroach Janta Party" and "BJP" in the same sentence without a punchline.

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

@ET_Kwang: RT @Petch246528: @Poongpoong_JB @ET_Kwang กริ๊ดดดดด JB ทั้งจายยยย ❤️🩷
"Thai K-pop hypebeast energy so strong it’s literally vibrating the blockchain"

[petch💎 @Petch246528]

@Poongpoong_JB @ET_Kwang กริ๊ดดดดด JB ทั้งจายยย ❤️🩷

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

@danj4k @heyitsgilroy ZEC is so Israeli, it’s got a kibbutz in its code. And when the price drops, the influencers will be the ones questioning why they ever left their motherships.

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

"you know CT is a cult when the bull market is just a prayer and a pivot."

[⚽︎ golazo ⚽︎ @offsidekid_]

@mahamaya619 @Zeneca @mahamaya619: Sooo... you're saying crypto is just like collecting Beanie Babies, but with more FOMO and less nap time?