Roxanne Deguara

If that's how shocked I looked on my wedding day, imagine my face when the baby farts like a sailor

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

http://t.co/8TZHwnFF - Initiating sex after having a baby… Remember, 6 weeks abstinance doesn't mean having to abstain from oral or anal.

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

@tiltycup Hi! Is there anywhere I can purchase tiltycups from in Europe? Or that has international shipping? :)

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

@PrettyAllTrue I ended up with an abandoned Labrador cause I font have the heart to say no to more pets. Thus does not bode well.

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

Like hell will I ever buy a pooping baby doll for my kid. Not after the mountain of shitty diapers I've seen. What is this treachery?

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

Put baby in jumperoo to get work done. Spend entire time laughing at baby, get no work done. #firstworldproblems :D

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

I've always hated teeth, and a teething baby hasn't made me change my mind one bit. #wanttosleep

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

@TwinsMa Congrats! :D Hope it goes through!!!

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

@PrettyAllTrue damn you! I was all ninja around the baby till that story made me laugh - snort. I want a video of the cereal eating!

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

Maneuvering in the dark around cranky 4 month old; I am a godamn ninja yeah

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

#Help!!! My 4 month old has suddenly decided that she has to scream for an hour before going to sleep. #Parenting #Tips needed! Sanity lost!

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

My dog has perfected the most infuriating sound on the planet. The Squeek Whine. It makes me want to punch him right in the tiny nuts.

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

Doing stuff for yourself.. Always much harder then doing stuff for others. Stupid critical nature and urge to procrastinate.

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

Sometimes I feel like I'm in some twilight zone, where everyone is tripping but me. Then I realize, no, these people are just idiots

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

@temysmom http://t.co/MoJF7CUi :D

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

Fuck you, people setting of fireworks. #WTF Today is not a holiday!!!

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

@larwe You may have a problem. Now thats good marketing

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

@larwe A true pizza lover might be enticed. On another note, sign at hospital: Do you have problems urinating? If the answer is NO...

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

Hundreds of toys… an what does the baby care about? The bottle of water. Obviously

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

@TheMommyInLaw Wait wait… why can't we wear green??? Is there a color ban I wasn't informed of?

[Roxanne Deguara @OhMyBubbles]

@ssmirnov The fact that she screams at you until you let her bite your face isn't really winning me over either lol