cheryl b

28. she/her. nerd. feminist. easily amused. both dog and cat friendly.

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

@SalVulcano #OldestTShirt mine is 15 years old (wore it to my first concert/warped tour) but i’m only 28 sooooo i can’t beat @SalVulcano

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

why do boys want you to watch them play video games? it’s boring as hell.
i’m only interested in heated matches of super smash.

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

ever since starting #iamnotokaywiththis i can’t stop yelling at syd “YOURE GAY YOU CLUELESS BABY. Gay GAY GAAAAY.”

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

local millennial tries to explain the sacred right of account sharing to her gen x boyfriend—who does not understand the ways we share to save a few bucks.

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

how does he manage to make everything about himself?
can he even say WHAT he did for african americans or anyone with a skin color different that his own?

[Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump]

It was exactly three years ago today, January 20, 2017, that I was sworn into office. So appropriate that today is also MLK jr DAY. African-American Unemployment is the LOWEST in the history of our Country, by far. Also, best Poverty, Youth, and Employment numbers, ever. Great!

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

my psychiatrist just recommended that i smoke weed for my anxiety. 🥳👍🏻👍🏻

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

how DARE you use the language of the people you’re assaulting. you’re not sorry at all. except a sorry sack of SHIT.

[Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump]

به مردم شجاع و رنج کشیده ایران: من از ابتدای دوره ریاست جمهوریم با شما ایستاده‌ام و دولت من همچنان با شما خواهد ایستاد. ما اعتراضات شما را از نزدیک دنبال می کنیم. شجاعت شما الهام بخش است.

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

i’m so fucking tired. i’m broke. i don’t have insurance. i applied for it and now am being told it’s not enough. being mentally ill is expensive. i’m going to need medication and therapy all my life probably. but health care, especially for mental illness, is too expensive

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

one of my new years resolutions is to love myself enough not to feel forced finish that last gross sip of beer

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

bags are only acceptable if there is a Wrapped Present inside.

[Sal Vulcano @SalVulcano]

Don't you give me no gift bag. You wrap that shit. WRAP. THAT. SHIT.

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

why didn’t mrs weasley ever give hermoine a christmas sweater?! y’all know she knots like a mofo with all them damn kids

[Aly @alyohsob]

Few things still slap as hard as the cave call in response in how the grinch stole xmas... “I’m an idiot”.....”You’re an idiot”
Me: 💀💀💀💀

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

i rememberrrrr, am i old?

[Dana Schwartz - on hiatus @DanaSchwartzzz]

I feel like if you told a teenager that Netflix used to let you watch TV shows by sending you individual DVDs in the actual mail, they would think you were making it up as a joke

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

@30spacechickens

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

now that i have access to disney+, i’m going to watch the movies i grew up with and cry about how sweet life was before i had any fucking clue what was going on.

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

everyone lives on their phone. if you don’t wanna text just say so, instead of not answering.
i know i do this as well sometimes but i am truly working on it.

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

this is the most pathetic thing i have EVER seen. everything he does makes me ashamed to be an american.

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

take that damn nap

[Joseph Gordon-Levitt @hitRECordJoe]

What advice would you give your younger self?

Tell me in 4 words... https://t.co/PopEL0y2ir

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

i’m watching AHS Apocalypse & really relating to the characters who realize the world has fallen to shit and just want it to end. so that’s my outlook on life currently.

[cheryl b @omnificoctopus]

is your child acting like a little dick? well then we’ve got the product for you

[Jenny Lawson @TheBloggess]

The most baffling thing Amazon recommended today: https://t.co/FBUL34hYBV "Funny Big Bird inflatable suit".