As a parent, I know so much about my child. I know what to do when he catches a cold, when his tummy hurts, when he gets a cut, when he's overtired. I know his body and his temper.
But I know little about his brain, and this is something I want to change.
Becoming more self-conscious and doing the inner work that makes me a balanced human being is the greatest gift I can give my child.
I guess nobody realizes how unbalanced they are until a child comes into play.
The hardest thing about raising my son is all the inner work I have to do with myself.
They said it will be hard. That I'll be losing sleep. And worry about everything.
But nobody told me this child would push all my buttons and show me how much I must fix myself.
Why?
Today was one of those days when I merely tried to survive.
Not my best Sunday.
I tried to pat myself on the back and think what Daniel Siegel would say to me - the moments you're just trying to survive are the best opportunities to teach your child to thrive.
How? Hooowww?
From all the traits I wish my child to develop, how much time do I actively spend trying to foster them?
This question got me thinking today...
As parents, we are usually in survival mode.
I would love to be more intentional with the time I spend with my son.
Parents want children who can speak for themselves when out in the world...
And who are obedient at home.
It's either one or the other. You can't have both.
And only children are more often forced to be obedient, otherwise accused of being spoiled. ๐ฅฒ
When my son was 2 I obsessed about him NOT playing with toys that kept him passive.
He got them anyway from family and friends.
Now he's 5 and broke almost all his electric cars.
What a joy to see him pushing around these cars.
Nothing in parenting is just black or white ๐คท๐ผโโ๏ธ
Everybody has an opinion on raising children.
If you have an only child, this is your first rodeo. Everybody's opinions can make you doubt yourself.
Yesterday, I showed my newsletter readers how to stop doubting.
Miss the issue?
Grab it below โ
https://t.co/wwhhQsxFs4
If it's Saturday, maybe you can catch your breath and read something to lift up your spirit.
Your only child could benefit greatly from you seeing this newsletter.
You could benefit greatly and gain more confidence in only-child parenting.
Read it here: https://t.co/wwhhQsxFs4
Parenting an only child = sailing a ship without a crew and...
xNo sense of the wind
xNo deep understanding of the tides
xNo innate connection with the ocean's rhythms
Tomorrow, my newsletter readers will a special view on it
To read it, join us here: https://t.co/wwhhQsxFs4
When you do things for your child instead of letting them do them...
You're shrinking their self-esteem and robbing them of the empowering feeling of being responsible for something.
Give them age-specific chores.
Don't tell them "you can't", tell them "soon, you will"
Peaceful parenting is often misunderstood.
You must take out spanking, threats, and punishments.
But you must also put something else instead.
You only get spoiled children when you leave the vessel empty.
Every time you have a reaction you regret - you yell at, you scold, or you threaten your child, it's because you're afraid of something.
Pause, breathe, and identify your fear.
Is it real?
What your child is doing right now is guaranteed to bring your fear to life?
2 things that can greatly impact how your child will grow up:
Praise their skills and effort, not just their results.
Always make them think of how they feel when they experience success.