Onsongo

Stoic

[Pharaoh👳🏾‍♂️👑 @MrMekzy_]

People who have access to you have no idea how unreachable you are to everyone else, until they become everyone else.

[Thatswhatshesaid @Neema_M11]

Wazee watatuua na mawaidha zao za kishenzi

[Cerebral Assassin @xysist]

I totally understand them but I’m not changing my tweeting style. This is who I am - A functional degenerate

[Uselu Park Chairman @StatiQfit]

If she looking at Lord Future like that then she’s unfortunately already under his Genjutsu, we can only pray for her now.

[🥷 @_iamhabeeb]

I’ve learned that doing too much for people doesn’t make them value you more.

[°Ocampo🇦🇷🇰🇪™ @Ocampolaw_1]

Kikuyu landlord watching you relocate from his rentals to the neighbourhood rentals that are also his.

[Asa @xAsamoahx]

I don’t know if he wanted me to write about someone else’s dog 😂

[Ropem @rofprayer]

@lynn_ngugi1 This is exactly why the tax base never expands. The government goes after the low-hanging fruit (salaried employees and registered SMEs) because auditing cash-based, multi-billion shilling cartels is too difficult or politically inconvenient.

[🐉 @Kamau266]

Wanawake huwa hawaamini their IQ means nothing kwa mambo ya kimwili.

[Kodak @its_pabloh1]

Marrying a strict woman so you can be the fun dad>> "Ngoja mama yenu awapate hapo".

[Quack Doctor, QD. @Mainah_Joseh]

Mimi ni Simba dia. Jambo.

[PreacherKid 🇰🇪🇬🇧 @ItsGregy_]

As a man learn to be dangerous & unpredictable. Don't go telling your wife every move you make, toka kwa nyumba enda Congo, wacha apigiwe simu aambiwe umeshikwa na Rebels.

[FantaBariidi 𓈒 𓇼 @MeranSays]

Baby formula is used to cut meth, coke and heroin. Labda ni Walter White anakufungia jicho mrembo. Let him cook.

[️ ️ ️ ️ @StrenjaDenja]

unarushia your corporate baddie a philosophical conundrum in the morning to challenge her mind na office husband anamuuliza "leo unavaa thong ama unakam ukiwa commando"

[Ja Loka @_fels1]

Where is the 2/3 gender rule when the world needs it?

[Aliyahhhh @Aliyahbolanle]

until it happens to you, you will think you are very careful, very responsible, very smart, very religious, very mature, very private, very etc.

[Villagegirl🌹 @wambuiMwangay]

@_mr_mutinda Mnashangaa mbona mtoto ako na tremors akiamka kumbe ni lock hamjamtoa😂😂

[Okowa Nashon @OkowaNashon]

SOON we shall have three-bedroom apartments of 50sqm in Kilimani/Kileleshwa. It is a stiff race to the bottom.

[MethoDman @polo_kimanii]

Coolkid ingine nilipatiwa na Mzee rafiki yangu niingize yeye Manual labour angalau apunguze uzembe,on monday son came to meet me wearing Crocs and sweatpants. Hapo ndio nilijua wamenipatia bladfakin

[Blaze Officiel @B3laze]

Your mum is an OG