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Birds Are Real But The Shrimp Colors Aren’t (they/them)

[oof @oof31699405]

Not abysmal, not dismal, but a secret third thing (pepto bismol)

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et al is a beautiful name for 2 or more baby children

[Irene Tu @irene_tu]

Watch my new @donttellcomedy set on YouTube! https://t.co/fG6nfsI5dX

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@HowITic I'm in

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it can be hard to describe what its like to have adhd but then I zone out for the whole morning then look at my Spotify history and it all just kind of makes sense (it's been four hours) (I've been listening to YMCA on repeat) (forgot to take my meds) (cleaned the kitchen though)

[oof @oof31699405]

@HowITic NEVER forget

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eBird for dinner again 😔😔😔

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@emmypadge I don't LIKE it! Are you telling me that I have to now retrain this muscle memory that I've had for YEARS????

[oof @oof31699405]

Merlin changed its layout, please respect my space in these troubled times

[oof @oof31699405]

*youth pastor voice* you know who Also has a fursona,

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transmascs naming themselves be like: verb

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At the bar sitting criss cross applesauce

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HOW COULD I FORGET ABOUT THIS?? PRINTING THIS OUT TOMORROW AND HANGING IT UP IN THE LAB!!!!!

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I'm framing this tweet at my desk when i move to fresno in august for grad school. Where I will be studying house finches

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When people do that thing where they refer to their drunk self by a different name but its me trying to distance myself from the actions of pickles georg who is fully sober and only exists to eat half a jar of pickles in one go in the middle of the day sometimes

[oof @oof31699405]

Post nut clarity when you are ace just means you are randomly hit with fully formed wisdom when you least expect it

[oof @oof31699405]

Never before have I had such a viscerally repulsive experience than just now when I put my hair binder on my left wrist for two seconds

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My phone just tried to correct mcdonalds to mxdonalds congratulations on the gender I guess

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@dynamicbanter @MikeFalzone @stevezaragoza IF ONLY I COULD EAT AT SUBWAY. THIS WOULD SOLVE ALL MY PROBLEMS!!!! I need to change my name anyway so why not go all in. Subway Franke.

[oof @oof31699405]

@beffmosdeff Melted ice cream. Pudding. Third thing. The list goes on

[oof @oof31699405]

@yours_featherly I am my own target audience

[oof @oof31699405]

I would like to present my official review of California after living here for three days: