Sylvia Mendez

Eh.....Fuck it.

[Sylvia Mendez @OooSly]

@NBCSongland Ya’ll NEED to find out from Lauren Dyson where she got those black leather pants in her second performance 🥵

[keegan @FranziaMom]

i’m baby

[Sylvia Mendez @OooSly]

I love how because of the #coronavirus pandemic, people have decided there are no rules anymore? Like not using their turning signals while driving at all??? I mean, damn ya’ll fucking didn’t to begin with but cmon, DO BETTER. Ya’ll irritating even at the end of the world 😒

[Philly’s Original Harden @KHJ_Esq]

Coronavirus got Boomers stocking their doomsday bunkers... meanwhile millennials are online shopping for bathing suits for the five island trip they just booked on Spirit for $130.

[Sylvia Mendez @OooSly]

When all my regulars are freaking out about the coronavirus and flu but keep coughing everywhere without COVERING their DAMN MOUTHS??? Uh sir?

[Sylvia Mendez @OooSly]

When your roomate @samkneetoe has some “hot” guy visit here and I’m just here for all the weird ass tea cuz the chemistry isn’t there like:

[tay @baaabytaaay]

so i texted someone yesterday asking if something was wrong with our friendship/relationship (because i felt as though something was off), was left on read and today i'm blocked on twitter?? please learn how to communicate if you're in your 20's, not everything is a confrontation

[Sylvia Mendez @OooSly]

@Mulcimer 😭 sameee

[Sylvia Mendez @OooSly]

Anyone know who this is? #comegetyourman

[Sylvia Mendez @OooSly]

@jmarquez346 Hah! Thanks 😅 I had to do the whole “no hard feelings” convo LOL

[Sylvia Mendez @OooSly]

I literally bounced from this guys place @ 4am after paying for the Uber there cuz he couldn’t get it up #dontsettle

[Sylvia Mendez @OooSly]

And I honestly thought long and hard about stealing some kind of box on their kitchen table that had heavy things inside.

I left it. You should be proud.

[Luanne Leanne @SamanthaSignoff]

Men ain’t shit y’all

[Kyle 🌱 @KylePlantEmoji]

Not feeling very fergalicious today :(

[parker @momappreciator]

hey TSA how you gonna take my toothpaste cause it’s “too big” but let me board with all this ass?

[Sylvia Mendez @OooSly]

No.

[lias @lias__]

Please take your Apple Watch off if you are wearing a dress or formal attire. You look like a spy kid

[Noah Evangelista @Evangelista_n1]

I hate texting/calling, just Venmo me.

[ً @clairotoon]

i think ben platt singing river by joni mitchell is the only thing i care about