Henry Rymer

“Brevity is the soul of wit.” - Bill Shakespeare

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

Is Dr. Pepper an M.D., a PhD, or one of those lame lawyers that insists a J.D. entitles him to the title?

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

“Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.”

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@JAPversus Spokane?

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

My kids yelling at me right before they do the most mundane thing possible

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@maxrrymer McDonald’s in Dinkytown deserves at least a star

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@Chazzy_Chaz @bustarymez96 Who ever said I stopped?

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

Me and the boys in Rocket League

[The Kobeissi Letter @KobeissiLetter]

PRESIDENT TRUMP:

"We are winning so much, that we really don't know what to do about it. People are asking me, please, please, please Mr. President, we are winning too much, we can't take it anymore."

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@AuronMacintyre Also, you seem like a Salamanders or Grey Knights guy. How close am I?

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@AuronMacintyre Rolling a 6 on a close combat weapon wound roll to see your opp roll a 1 on their vehicle save is a euphoria that can’t easily be put into words.

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@spencer_askew Having sex with one’s wife?

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@packers_access Dude was probably like 25 in this photo looking like a 58 year old

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@DailyCaller This week, I intend to introduce a bill to Abolish ICE! We need to make ICE go away!” — me after month 7 of Minnesota winter

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@WesHod He’a a Swiss Army? Like he sits around, never gets involved, and is sidelined in every major conflict?

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@Breaking911 This was my favorite map in CoD 4

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@DramaAlert I can’t believe he’d get caught up in this…

[Kurt Benkert @KurtBenkert]

If Jameis Winston throws and INT this Sunday, I will give away a Legends Football to someone that likes and retweets this.

May the odds be in your favor.

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

Truly disgusting that we do this to cows just to get egg nog during the holidays. Congress needs to intervene NOW.

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@SonnyBunch This is just a picture of Gary, Indiana in early fall

[Henry Rymer @OptimusRyme]

@CityBureaucrat 🎶 Every new beginning is some other new beginning’s end 🎶