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geologia usp || neste perfil amamos própolis verde e própolis vermelho || bobo da corte por amor

[︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ @pakasideia]

Pelo amor de Deus

[christine @christineist]

talking to my single friend she's seeing a guy who seems pretty great on all fronts except for "the deep despair underlying his every move"

[Libby, strongest preygirl @libbysalt]

Cockblocking implies the existence of cockparrying with precise timing

[︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ @pakasideia]

sábado passado vendo o jogo eu tava assim

[cameron! @workreps]

#pouroutabeeronyourcrotchchallenge

[cameron! @workreps]

#pouroutabeeronyourcrotchchallenge

[woahh mann @ashhhhhhole]

just found out that walruses like to stick their tusks out of the water and hold on to the ice and just float

[Mëan Feen🏴‍☠️ @Robatuss1n]

how it feels to be the only one in the friend group who still smokes weed

[︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ @pakasideia]

só tem trânsito quando você tá no ônibus e precisa mijar

[kys 4 africa @bigsnugga]

@Ak6338952927051 its necessary the juju gets out of hand

[geek bar miami mint @yourhotstonergf]

it is way too hot to be wearing a condom

[ирис @saltwatermp3]

If we are ever playing chess together and you take my horse you are dead to me. I like him

[turbomander @turbomander]

*necromancer having a bad day watching his skeleton army*
necromancer: faster, you useless piles of bones! move faster!
his second in command general skeletrex: sorry boss, but these here infernal machines weight a skelly-ton!
necromancer: *smiles* i needed that today, skeletrex

[karst @polygon_heart]

grabs you and tugs on you and keeps you in bed forever because i'm sooo sleepy and i want cuddles and you're so warm so you have to okay......

[The sunny side of Franz Kafka @AmschelKavka]

Once and ten times and a thousand times and forever I want to be with you

Franz Kafka, 1920.

[USFBULLS69 @usfbulls69]

“AI is gonna take your job”

I’d like to see AI mix a shitty batch of concrete and tell the apprentice to secretly bury it in the homeowner’s garden

[fish𓆛𓆜𓆝𓆞𓆟 @fishdanshi]

I thought of a new hypothetical to ask your partner: if I was an invasive species would you kill me for the good of the ecosystem or would you love me so much that you’d allow me to ravage the earth

[maia 🌱 lesbotron 3000 @rashomoon_]

adorei que os bandeijoes da usp agr tem proteína surpresa 🥰 #valeureitor

[turbomander @turbomander]

*says something so embarrassing that i curl up and begin to molt*
*gesturing at my discarded exoskeleton* was that guy bothering you

[Shane 🦧 @TheMonkeyJungle]

Him getting smaller and smaller as he walks up to the truck is some real Peter Jackson The Lord of the Rings forced perspective movie magic

[︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ @pakasideia]

saudades da minha mulher