Amanda

using jokes to cover up some of her issues

[Seinfeld Current Day @Seinfeld2000]

Roses are red

violets are blue

the jerk store called

Theyre running out of you

[Amanda @partyturtles]

@manyloinezz I think I'll need a total hip replacement.

[James @CaucasianJames]

y’all mind if i have a good week

[Amanda @partyturtles]

@manyloinezz I wouldn't know!

[Amanda @partyturtles]

Two of my residents saw me first thing this morning and opened their arms wide for a hug. #yallcantbringmedowntoday

[Micha van den Herik @michavdherik]

the idea dating
of having
a loving partner

[Amanda @partyturtles]

@manyloinezz

[Amanda @partyturtles]

Me trying to firmly stay in my 20's: breakfast today is 3 ibuprofen and an energy drink.

Not because I'm hungover, because I hurt my back SLEEPING last week and I'm too cheap/scared to go to the doctor.

[red whine supernova 🌟 @sarahndipity18]

people say

"there are

so many fish

in the sea"

but

my fish

is in

the fish tube

-rupi kaur

[Lansing Facts 🫒 @LansingMIFacts]

like seriously they build Camaros here it's inexcusable that fish can't haul ass through town

[Amanda @partyturtles]

Today someone just radioed "Cucumbers are ready. I repeat: The cucumbers are ready."

[Amanda @partyturtles]

Someone keeps playing the "I'm melting! I'm melting!" clip from the Wizard of Oz on the walkie and it's the only thing that is giving me joy today.

[Amanda @partyturtles]

@manyloinezz Tank, obviously.

[Amanda @partyturtles]

@maritessheep I've cried in my car while eating Taco Bell. But I was parked at the Walmart.

[✨Rad Sinner✨ @manyloinezz]

The Rum Rats hit a new low today when at brunch the server said “for legal reasons, we can’t bring you that much alcohol”

[LIZZO @lizzo]

Can somebody please ask “why are men great till they gotta be great” at the #DemDebate2020

[Amanda @partyturtles]

@manyloinezz #TrustYourGut

[Amanda @partyturtles]

@maritessheep @manyloinezz Oh my gosh. SEA TURTLES

[Amanda @partyturtles]

We need appropriate diagnosis for any psych meds a person is on and that's one of the things I track. I just said "Can I get a depression diagnosis?" to the tune of "Can I get a whoop whoop?" to my nurse. And I've already had enough of me today.