Patrick Gertner

GC Supt for 37 years. Retired #PennStateTurf #StBonaventure.

[Zara Quinn @_Zaraquin]

Spanish goalkeeper in the world cup finals 😂😂

[Benjamin Smith @BSmith]

Bryson at #TheOpen

[Sama Hoole @SamaHoole]

"Beef uses 15,000 liters of water per kilogram."

Right. Yes. Staggering number. Enormous. Cannot argue with the size of it.

One question though, if you'll permit it. Just one. Very small. Easily answered.

Where does the water come from?

Not philosophically. Not as a rhetorical exercise. Literally. Physically. Where does the water in that calculation come from?

It comes from the sky.

It is rain. British rain. The thing that has been falling on Britain continuously since before anyone thought to keep records and that, if you've spent more than forty minutes in this country, you will be aware is not exactly a limited resource we need to manage carefully. It is falling on a field. As it would whether or not a cow was standing in it. As it did before the cow arrived. As it will do long after everyone who has ever shared that statistic on social media has departed this planet for whatever comes next.

Here is the question nobody asks. If you removed every cow from that field tomorrow morning, every single one, gone, lorry comes, the lot, would it rain less?

No. Of course it wouldn't. The rain does not consult agricultural policy. The rain does not know about the infographic. The rain has one job and that job is to fall, and it performs that job with tremendous consistency regardless of what is standing beneath it.

The water does not get saved. The water still falls. It just has no root system to soak into, no grazed sward to slow its movement, no hoof-churned surface to increase infiltration. It runs off the compacted, ungrazed field into the nearest river, picks up whatever topsoil hasn't been fastened down, carries it downstream, and deposits it in someone else's flood plain.

The cow is not drinking your planet.

The cow is, if you want to be pedantic about it, one of the more useful things that could happen to that rainfall.

Go outside. It's probably raining. Have a think.

[Zach Wignall @Zwignall523]

Check it out.

[Patrick Gertner @patrickgertner]

@MattSha20619144 @PatJonesTweets This is the way!!!

[Positive Side of 𝕏 @positivesideofx]

This is hilarious and so accurate 🤣🤣🤣

[Vince Langman @LangmanVince]

I feel your pain, brother 🤣🤣

[KIP HENLEY @KipHenley]

Good goodness this was a way underrated performance if you were born before 1980.

[Bonchie @bonchieredstate]

Every left-winger should have their eyes held open and be forced to watch this on repeat until it sinks in.

https://t.co/o9mdkh5fWE

[James Montanus @JamesMontanus]

The foliage around Canandaigua Lake is on fire! This is the best color I've seen on Canandaigua since 2011.

[MikeyBets @RealMikeyBets]

Only one man can save Aaron Judge.

[Reed Timmer, PhD @ReedTimmerUSA]

Massive debris flow traveling at lightning speed in eastern TN! The preceding drought conditions followed by days of rain ahead of Hurricane Helene set the stage. This is incredibly rapid for a debris flow.

[Freyja™ @FreyjaTarte]

Escape from Springfield Ohio.

[NUCLR GOLF @NUCLRGOLF]

⛳️🛌🏌️‍♂️ One of the best golf commercials you’ll ever watch 🤣

[Patrick Gertner @patrickgertner]

Sprigs and newly seeded #PureDistinction greens (and our Goosegrass crop) all survived #Hillary and her 3.05” rainfall. Amazed…..we thought we were doomed. Greengrass #Topgolf #Troon.

[Patrick Gertner @patrickgertner]

Never thought we would be doing hurricane preparedness exercises in SoCal. Hope you sprigs can stay a lil while longer. #Troon #Topgolf.

[Patrick Gertner @patrickgertner]

@DLatshawTurf Thank you!!!!

[Patrick Gertner @patrickgertner]

First greens irrigation. GreenGrass #TopGolf #LA. #PureDistinction. #Troon

[13WHAM @13WHAM]

Members of an Indigenous tribe have reportedly expressed interest in taking back the land now occupied by popular ice cream makers Ben & Jerry's after the company posted a Fourth of July tweet calling for America to return "stolen" land.

https://t.co/NODC7UTfxx