patty

funnier in person

[Chocolate💋 @favoritel8dy]

Literally how it feels to instantly click with somebody

[patty @pattywithphatty]

If only insurance could cover zyns

[nare #musictwt @naremaea]

needed a smoke break but i'm back

[ian @cupid_dlx]

110-year-old Turkish grandma shares her secret to a long life:

"I streamed ‘WOR$T GIRL IN AMERICA’ by Slayyyter when it dropped on 3/27/26 at midnight local time”

[thomass :p @elendegenerates]

me at the worst girl in the world tour when i hear drugs make this kitty go purr

[doomvienne @ketaminebear]

asked waiter at red lobster if they liked tate mcrae and they said “idk who he is”

[gojo d. kida ☾ elbaph @planofdissent]

watching bad bunny perform as a non-puerto rican

[patty @pattywithphatty]

@itsallegrad Was this pit

[patty @pattywithphatty]

This is like Avengers End Game for gay people

[Bravo @BravoTV]

Ready to whoop it up for 20 year of Real Housewives? INTRODUCING....the core cast for next season of The Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip!

🍊Vicki Gunvalson
🍎Luann de Lesseps
🍑Porsha Williams
🍝Teresa Giudice
💎Kyle Richards
🥂Gizelle Bryant
❄️Lisa Barlow

And word on the street is....this #RHUGT will also have appearances by dozens of * very cool * Housewives from across the cities and eras! Yes...we do big things.

[patty @pattywithphatty]

If my family can force me to go to church once a year it’s only fair I force them to go to a gay bar once a year

[patty @pattywithphatty]

In a world Demi Lovato made a better album than Taylor Swift….

[Ebolaman @ebolaman131]

woke is back

[patty @pattywithphatty]

Gay people will put you on their close friends story and then not acknowledge you in public

[patty @pattywithphatty]

I wish they had a fantasy football team for the housewives

[Amelia @ameliabiIity]

Jesus adds new verse to the Bible

[patty @pattywithphatty]

Taylor Swift hate is sooo forced

[patty @pattywithphatty]

Me after drinking two days back to back (why am I having such bad hangovers and I’m 23)

[patty @pattywithphatty]

Gonna skip my SSRI dose when I see Ethel Cain just so I can feel it all

[patty @pattywithphatty]

Pregaming for another concert right now … I’m so tired

[patty @pattywithphatty]

Only three more weekends left in summer… we have to go crazy and push through the Lollapalooza exhaustion