Paulo Cruelo

The forgotten evil twin of Paulo Coelho. He swore to fight his twin by exposing the truth about love, life & destiny, one tweet at a time. Let's get DEEP, baby!

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas to all of you losers!

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

I want to know about the future because I'm a man and I don't know what the hell I'm talking about.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

I forgive you not because I became a saint, but because I owe money to your dad.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

No heart has ever suffered when you go easy on those double cheeseburgers.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

When you meditate long enough, you can hear The Universe whisper to you: "Get a real job".

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

'The Alchemist' is literature's most potent hair dye. The more you read it, the blonder you get.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

When you love someone, set him free. If he comes back, you maybe dating a Labrador.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

If you love someone, set him free. If he doesn't come back: you are ugly

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

No heart has ever suffered when you go easy on bacon and watch your cholesterol.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

Love never keeps a man from pursuing crazy wild sex somewhere else.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

When you are in love, things make even more sense. Until the credit card bill arrives.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

Another year, another opportunity to fail.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

Smartphones: helping us not to stare at ugly people since 2009.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

Hey, Merry Christmas folks! Still single?

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

Everything happens for a reason. Your stupid face is a reason.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

May we smile to people that we encounter, because punching them leads to jail.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

I was this close to reaching my Destiny. And then the government shut down.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

The first road to God is prayer. The second is riding your bike without helmet.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

The language that everyone on earth was capable of understanding is in their pocket. It was MasterCard.

[Paulo Cruelo @paulocruelo]

There is a universal language, understood by everybody. It's called "cash".