Paul Smith

I write stuff. Most days.

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@ScottHam71 Why are they all so stupid? And genetically challenged?

[NHS Million @NHSMillion]

If everyone who has ever been grateful for the NHS followed and retweeted we would reach a million by midnight

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@JayPatrol What would Peter Griffin look like made flesh?

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@thistallawkgirl Her having a sensible, scientifically supported opinion is like watching a cat walk on its hind legs

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@PaulEmbery @RealMattLucas Go and watch Rocky I and II and remember that this literally happens in boxing All. The. Time.

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@MarkFrancois12 @tobycarvery Did they put you in a high chair or big boy chair?

[Katie Rife @RifewithKatie]

Re: PET SEMATARY: I just keep thinking about whose job it was on set every day to dirty up the cat. Like, “oh, yeah, I have to go in early tomorrow, I have to rub some Vaseline and coffee grounds on this cat”

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

Remember when we thought social media and the free exchange of information would liberate and educate people?

How's that going?

[Guillaume Chaslot @gchaslot]

The Philippines is the country in the world with the highest use of social media per day.

From 2015 to 2018, the belief that vaccines are important decreased there from 93% to 32%

This country is a canary in the coal mine

[Amy @amymarkscouk]

there's a new guy at work starting called Wayne Bruce and I said "ah, my old nemesis ManBat" and nobody got it honestly i am wasted here

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@Walldo I look at British politicians being increasingly idiotic and then a glance back over at Trump reminds me that however self destructive we are currently being, America electing a man this fucking dumb still wins. We are on our way to this though.

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@aman61bc @TIME Greatest statistical argument ever attempted...

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@scottEweinberg @kumailn Same kind of fuckwit who has never realised Star Wars or X-Men were about fighting fascism.

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@fletchybels @TranmereRovers THERE I AM!

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@BeardedGenius Scorpio from Gladiators and Ray Stubbs.

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

Just in case you were wondering if politicians were always petty at crucial points in history. Jonathan Powell in The Times today. And oh for a sharp young civil servant like that who could find a solution right now.

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@Channel4News @Nigel_Farage You were barely fucking there the first time round you fraud.

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@Challengeitnow Fair point, but too subtle for them to understand.

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

@Challengeitnow Cunts

[Paul Smith @PaulSmith7]

He must be pissing himself.