Jim Smith

Evertonian. PR. Jim/James. Opinions mostly stolen from Jerry Springer’s Final Thought.

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@krishgm Completely and totally in agreement, Krish.

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

Low offer incoming 🚨🚨🚨 #thechase

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@grandoldteam Wet.

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

‘I have a 6 year old in PANAMAAA!’ - come on Toby! #thechase

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

Vicky’s buzzer wasn’t working #thechase

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

I actually think the goal should have been disallowed.

Said no one. Except VAR. it’s a fucking shambles.

#NEWMCI

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@BoyGeorge how has no one used Black Money on 45 speed as a hip hop sample yet?

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@BRYN_BORANGA This was also Michael Fish’s standard response when viewers called the Met Office worried about impending hurricanes in the 80s.

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@ALANMYERSMEDIA You can see the remorse in his eyes about buying Francis Jeffers for £12m the season before.

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@jim_keoghan Barry Glendenning on their podcast season preview tipped Everton for the drop.

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@fesshole This is the exact same technique my mother uses to cook the Brussels sprouts for Christmas lunch.

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

Silence is golden, Imogen. Absolutely stolen that £4,500 #thechase

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@BRYN_BORANGA Wimbledon was better when Centre Court didn’t have a roof, and Cliff would sing Congratulations in the rain, with the BBC News helicopter circling overhead and Sue Barker cutting to mixed doubles on Court 4 with a mix of horror and relief.

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@fesshole My first boss would delight in asking people weird questions during interviews. He asked one guy: ‘How much do you want the job, would you fuck a dog to get it?’ The guy deadpan responded: ‘What breed?’ - wanker couldn’t even think of a breed of dog and told him to leave.

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@BRYN_BORANGA Wait, I thought it was Staying Alive you had to keep the rhythm to if you were having a stroke?

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@Ralph_Hapschatt @coldwarsteve Guilty, snitch and cuntflap.

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@leylahamed @NSNO1878_ @PepTeam Free Ukraine, Free Palestine, Free Grealish.

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@elonmusk ‘How’s Waymo?’ ‘Waymo’s fine, honey.’ ‘Your foster parents are dead.’

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@SkyNews If you want me to stay
I'll be around today
To be available for you to see
But I am about to go
And then you'll know
For me to stay here, I got to be me

[Jim Smith @pearsquasher]

@fesshole Stealing a regular KitKat by not scanning it properly is known as a 'four-finger discount.'