Dark Brandon Secret Service

did you just? (he/him)

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

'Don't ask me how. Once up a time a really powerful magic field must have been generated here, and we're feeling the aftereffects.'

'Precisely,' said a passing bush.

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

@PokemonTCGDrops Sold out in cdn

[Nature is Amazing ☘️ @AMAZlNGNATURE]

Today I learned scientists discovered a dinosaur tail perfectly preserved in amber. It is full of feathers.

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

'Slay' is a universal adjective & verb with the ability to both insult and compliment. Might be my word of the week.

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

If I try and unsubscribe from your emails and the link it directs me to is down--I'm calling the police.

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

I don't know who needs to hear this @Crunchyroll but recaps shouldn't spoil the episode. Heartbreaking.

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

@elonmusk Ligma looks cheeeeeeeesed

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

I don't know whether to delete Twitter or stay for this ticking clock but options are satisfying

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

Everyone's wearing those fluffy Patagonia sweaters with that body silhouette and I'm sick of it.

(Where do I buy one)

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

@AOC Your feedback is appreciated, now pay $8

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez @AOC]

Lmao at a billionaire earnestly trying to sell people on the idea that “free speech” is actually a $8/mo subscription plan

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

I totally forgot I gotta get rid of the anti-semite 11s in my shoe closet

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

If we keep killing each other there will be nothing left. Our struggle is not with each other. It's structured to seem as such.

[vampire workday @imbobswaget]

i don't know if it's particularly helpful but every man is just some guy please remember that

[(J.I.D) @JIDsv]

Smh this shit is disgusting, hateful shit man

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

I'm swiping left on life

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

Fionna and Cake is the cutest shit.

Love learning Rebecca Sugar was invooooovled.

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

@RayBNadon Love you boo, burning your place of work down for u next week

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

I feel like every new artist I find I have to vet for some shit.cant yall just make music and not fuck me up over your antisemitism or racism

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

I'm baaaack

[Dark Brandon Secret Service @penmasterjay]

If you can make garlic bread I'm in. We're good. Lock me the f up