@beathinker4922@TexasTamieK@HEB Hahahaha, come to Galveston, we have target, Walmart, and Kroger’s, everyone drives 30 minutes away to grocery shop at the nearest HEB…
As Gov. Greg Abbott weighs whether or not to sign SB3, he might want to consider some new polling. A new survey from a Trump-aligned pollster found that 44% of Republican voters oppose the THC ban, and 70% of all Texas voters want it to remain legal.
https://t.co/gXx3mTO9yM
BREAKING: Texas Teen Eats Hemp Gummy, Immediately Declares War on America
Austin, TX — A 19-year-old from Plano allegedly consumed a single Delta-8 gummy from a licensed hemp retailer and within minutes, attempted to secede from the United States, rename his dog “Sativa,” and apply for a license to open a drive-thru bong bar in a school zone.
According to officials who have never actually visited a hemp store, the teen became “so high” he began to levitate, recite Russian poetry, and construct a makeshift shrine to Willie Nelson out of vape cartridges and Hot Cheetos.
“He was a straight-A student before that one gummy,” said Lt. Governor Dan Patrick, visibly shaking. “Now he thinks Elon Musk is a time traveler and that he can feel the Constitution breathing.”
Sources say the teen had previously drank four energy drinks and 11 shots of whiskey, took his Adderall prescription, and hadn’t slept in two days—but officials are certain it was the hemp gummy that made him hallucinate a conversation with George Washington about TikTok.
Patrick has called for immediate action. “If we don’t ban hemp right now, children will be turning into sentient clouds by the end of the week.”
Officials are also investigating reports that after eating the gummy, the teen tried to legally marry a bottle of CBD massage oil.
Join us for more stories by Dan Patrick. @GregAbbott_TX
#vetosb3 #SaveTexasHemp #inactionisaction #Texashempbusinesscouncil
Reminder, @GregAbbott_TX vetoed a bill that would criminalize leaving dogs out in extreme heat without water, stating that Texans have too many laws, if he thinks people that abuse animals shouldn’t be in jail, potheads definitely shouldn’t be in jail! #VetoSB3
@GregAbbott_TX You vetoed a bill that protected animals against abuse claiming Texans have too many laws. If animal abusers don’t belong in jail, someone sitting at home smoking pot definitely doesn’t belong in jail. #vetosb3
@JenatxR@jirkacepelka@TforThirty24@CitizensSafe@LtGovTX@DanPatrick No point in arguing with someone that created a profile just to promote an unpopular agenda. The fact is that most people support legalization, but for some reason people think they are more important than the population as a whole.
@acnewsitics So, I’m a veteran, I don’t find either disrespectful, but what I do find disrespectful is people like you that use us as props just to further a political agenda.
@stevehamkins@YourAnonCentral Do you realize that we’re currently supporting fascist governments? Do you realize that the current administration is fascist as well? Do you realize how much they censor and gaslight the public? Dems are no different.