Christine Flatt

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

Civilization is just one really long and annoying group project. http://t.co/KzxyPaUO

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

Moonwalking away after mugging someone because you're a smooth criminal. http://t.co/Q0QYaUxD

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

Sometimes it's really hard to tell who's winning when you fight sarcasm with sarcasm. http://t.co/XyJjBwlR

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

I hope my memory foam mattress doesn't remember the man in my bed last night and tell my boyfriend. http://t.co/2A4e24Vs

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

http://t.co/Q0QYaUxD Thumb war is never the thumb answer.

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

At this point, every item on drive-thru menus should have "Uhhh..." in front of it. http://t.co/gJqoQzNc

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

http://t.co/dyQRu9iS When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's LUNAR ASSAULT and it's not funny.

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

http://t.co/0SiqlbNF I’ve said it before. Wednesday. Where you’re too far out to see weekend in any direction.

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's LUNAR ASSAULT and it's not funny. http://t.co/c4jZOEZf

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

I'm not Anti-Social. I'm Pro-Doing Shit on my Phone. http://t.co/K1L9ic1T

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

http://t.co/2A4e24Vs I hope rapidly clicking this arrow on Google Street View counts as jogging.

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

I hope rapidly clicking this arrow on Google Street View counts as jogging. http://t.co/c4jZOEZf

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

I hope my memory foam mattress doesn't remember the man in my bed last night and tell my boyfriend. http://t.co/KzxyPaUO

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

http://t.co/0SiqlbNF I think all crime scenes should be photographed on Instagram.

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

I hope rapidly clicking this arrow on Google Street View counts as jogging. http://t.co/K1L9ic1T

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

Dammit I hate when the bus breaks down and I am far and away the most delicious looking passenger. http://t.co/2A4e24Vs

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

I'm the designated driver so it's mini bottles in the restroom for me http://t.co/hr3TiWB1

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

Shoveling snow would be so much more fun if it were porn. http://t.co/0SiqlbNF

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

New http://t.co/ppSgSjGR

[Christine Flatt @petuala]

Best enhancement with free samples http://t.co/AfTukJR0