Philip Sullivan

you think you just fell out of a coconut tree?

[No BS Therapist @TweetATherapist]

RIP Freud. You would’ve loved how people identify as Boy Moms and Girl Dads but rarely as Girl Moms or Boy Dads

[Dr. Alex Zawacki @achillghost]

Is there a scientific reason no one has been able to replicate the original video of the cop being ejected at Mach 2 or did the slide just judge him impure of heart

[JOELVENILE @joelvenile]

Freddy’s grandkids aren’t gonna believe one thing he ever tells them lol

[Julia Dugan @juju_Dugan18]

Americans: "our food is garbage"
Europeans: "BUCCEES, TACO BELL, CHILIS, WAFFLE HOUSE, REFILLS. AMERICA🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸"

[meredith @noyeahobviously]

Thinking about the accent combinations happening in sports bars in Boston right now, chills

[santos-inistas @JDabknee]

Gay person: I am gay

Trans person: I am trans

Charli Xcx: I’m making rockkkkk muuussicc

Person who didn’t watch spongebob: “yeah i don’t actually get that reference because my parents didn’t let me watch spongebob”

[maddyy @localsweety]

we are witnessing unfathomable levels of "the european mind cannot comprehend this" in realtime

[Icee Q. Bagsworth @gofastmotorcycl]

Meep meep ass locale

[Integrity Guy @Integrity_Freak]

No ma’am, I don’t have a boarding pass. I’m simply here to enjoy the world famous dining and nightlife at O’Hare International Airport

[Philip Sullivan @Philippp18]

lost opportunity to say Vicodin

[buddy |🔻 ( TADC SPOILERS / TADC LEAKS ) @snailsandbugsss]

if you like strawberry ice cream you should try cocaine

[Benny Boy @Camel_Crushin]

I have absolutely no interest in the World Cup, but I’m following a German soccer fan traveling the South as if my life depended on it.

[fal @finefal]

That German guy experiencing the South is the best thing on the internet right now.

[ol’ stocky ⛳️ @oldstocky]

I can understand why Italians saw this and decided to invent unemployment

[Corey D Lewis and 99 others @CoreyLewis86]

They absolutely used to have a PT cruiser

[bea 🇧🇷 @SlLENTPRINCESS]

bringing this gem back

[rami @ctrlkugi]

Wut da fuck are you doing

[mimi @realwebmimi]

quando ela tava flertando com o vizinho do ap da frente pela janela e mostrou o peito pra ele e depois quando ela vê ele no mercado e fala oi sou eu ele fica??? aí ela faz o movimento de mostrar o peito e ele diz ah vc é a mulher que mora embaixo do cara com quem
eu to flertando

[rob @subwaybae]

You couldn’t pay me to unmute this

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

Being part of a generation that was told “Wikipedia is not a source” makes it genuinely baffling to me that jobs are now telling people to just use ChatGPT for everything.

[Amanda Milius @AmandaMilius]

I will personally pay the Obsession art director chick at this point if it makes this discussion die off my timeline forever.