https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social

Just 'cause you put syrup on something don't make it pancakes.

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

@mnolte1289 I use two hands, so I guess I better start kissing dudes now.🤷

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

Probably migrating over to BlueSky.
https://t.co/dTNOnffKcx

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

@sammerdee Lol. Wait. Wut? He seriously didn't know?!

[Rory Blank @BoneJail]

With people jumping to all kinds of conclusions about motives, I think it's important to remember that Charles Guiteau shot President Garfield because he wanted to be ambassador to France and thought God told him to, and experts concluded he was driven mad by his weird foreskin

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

Rooftop report: this concert fucking blows.

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

@sorry_hat It already comes with its own intro too. https://t.co/z6WpxFJOsk

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

Everyone sending me the cicada Malört shots like I haven't already seen it. I'd try it, but I'll need a shot of Malört to chase it with.

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

@DevinPanda I'm Storm ⛈️🌪️🌬️

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

It was thick cut peppercorn bacon if that makes a difference...

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

10 pieces of bacon and three beers is an acceptable meal for a human, right?

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

@ryanarey I love Brett Goldstein's Films to be Buried With.

[Erica Lafferty @EricaAsh199213]

.@elonmusk - you’ve welcomed @RealAlexJones back to this platform, after he was removed for spreading lies about me and others like me. If you are giving his lies and hate a platform, will you do the same for Alex’s victims? I’d love to talk more with you.

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

@jayjayblt Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules.

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

@jamieloftusHELP I'll have a hot dog to celebrate.

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

I really shouldn't be gambling with giving myself food poisoning this many days in a row.

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

I'm not everyone's cup of tea, and a lot more people's shot of Malört.

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

@BriLeRose I pre-ordered that gorgeous Sea Blue vinyl from Janelle Monae as soon as I saw it!

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

@jamieloftusHELP your favorite Midwest bartender says hello! @bayleemcdunna1

[https://bsky.app/profile/clubsandwich.bsky.social @PhilspelledFAIL]

It's 7am my guy, you don't need to be driving around smoking a fat cigar.

[Phil Lord @philiplord]

guess what show's original first season is now on @hbomax oh I might as well tell you it's #CloneHigh