Phil Welsh

HCAFC 🐯 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@talkSPORT

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@bagaspannerz65 @ianswatman I have a spare ticket I’m in Benidorm at the minute home tomorrow morning but if you need it DM me only want what I paid for it 👍🏻

[A View From Yorkshire @models_by_Russ]

Dear Prime Minister & Home Secretary,

I hope this letter finds you well, fully caffeinated, and in possession of a calculator.

I’m writing with what I believe is a modest, fiscally responsible proposal. I understand the Government is offering up to £40,000 to certain individuals to voluntarily leave the United Kingdom. First of all — bold strategy. Nothing says “strong borders” quite like a cashback scheme.

Now, I regret to inform you that I am, in fact, a fully tax-paying, law-abiding British citizen. I know — awkward. I appreciate this may disqualify me from the premium exit package, but I’m willing to negotiate.

I would like to formally apply for £35,000 to leave.

You see, unlike some applicants, I haven’t broken any laws to get here. I didn’t arrive by dinghy. I didn’t require processing, housing, or legal appeals. I’ve actually been funding the whole operation through PAYE for years — which I believe makes me a loyal shareholder in this enterprise.

Given that you’re prepared to offer £40,000 for someone to depart voluntarily after entering illegally, I feel £35,000 for someone who’s been here legally all along represents excellent value for money. Think of it as a “Buy British, Get One Gone” discount.

For £35,000 I will:
   •   Leave quietly.
   •   Not require a press conference.
   •   Not demand a diversity officer to wave me off.
   •   Even carry my own suitcase to the airport.

I may also tweet a polite thank-you note on departure, praising the efficiency of the scheme.

Frankly, it feels like I’ve misunderstood how incentives work in modern Britain. All these years I thought obeying the law, paying taxes, and contributing to society were the winning strategy. Turns out the real pro-move is to arrive unlawfully and wait for a loyalty bonus.

Who knew?

While British families are juggling rent, energy bills, and the weekly food shop like contestants on a dystopian game show, it’s reassuring to know the Treasury has located a spare £40,000 per head for voluntary goodbyes.

May I ask — is there a points card? Ten years of National Insurance contributions and I get a free exit bonus? If so, I believe I’m overdue.

In the spirit of fairness and fiscal responsibility, I am not even asking for the full £40,000. I’m trimming £5,000 off to help balance the books. That’s the kind of responsible budgeting I was raised on.

If successful, I promise to:
   •   Leave via a scheduled flight (economy is fine).
   •   Not stage a protest on the runway.
   •   And refrain from re-entering on a small boat to see if I qualify twice.

All I ask is equal treatment. If departure is now a funded career pathway, I would very much like to submit my CV.

Yours in hopeful relocation,
A slightly confused taxpayer

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

What a day that was 🧡🖤

[Hull City News ⚫️🟠 @HullCityStats]

Portsmouth away tomorrow…

Matt Crooks is BACK and available for #HCAFC. 🖤🧡

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@MikeTown44 This video is in fact an own goal, you’ve completely missed the point of what today is about!

The problem doesn’t lay with good hard working legal immigrants and that’s not what the million or so people in are marching for today! This video is clear evidence of that

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@Corben_C21 The irony of you having in your bio ‘right wing rattler’ and here you are completely rattled by the right wing 😂

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@Thehullboy1 @MindCharity Well done, absolutely phenomenal effort and a huge achievement!

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@HullCity Lewie coyle highest score on the punch bag machine?

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@JohnAcko1985 I agree! At times I’ve questioned selles changes and how late he’s sometimes made them but I don’t think he trusts the full squad I would keep him in back him and give him a go he came with a mission to keep us up after Tim left us in a mess and he accomplished it

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@GeorgeSlatcher Like wise your fan base were great spent 3 days there and didn’t meet one bad person, all absolutely spot on 🤝

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@lynnegelhardt Happy birthday joff, I would give my right arm to keep him at hull full time been immense for us since coming in 🐯

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@RP2218 That is some achievement, I take my hat off to you fair play 👍🏻

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@PedroThurgs @HullCity @mscores_ Home fans were excellent yesterday clapping at the end actually looked to be happy we stayed up then meeting after in the pubs they were all absolutely excellent 👍🏻

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@Corben_C21 How could this be embarrassing for you given the current government 🤷🏽‍♂️ honestly baffles me

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@LewisOsborne01 Well said 👍🏻

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@Thehullboy1 Cmon Marcus keep plugging away! I imagine it’s getting tough at this point but you just need to keep your mentality right and focusing on why your doing this everyone in hulls behind you #UTT

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@Stephiono @Element_M1ller 😂😂😂😂 such a underrated comment this 😂

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@willbailey2003 @HullCity @HullCityST Sorry for your loss will, I knew Dan from back in the day he was a good lad with a good heart I hope we can all pull together at the Plymouth game and give him an applause as requested

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@piersmorgan At this point the labour government are just bantering us 🙃 surely any sound minded person would listen to her views and agree she isn’t fit for any role in government!

[Phil Welsh @philwelsh16]

@HarveyJB24 I’m a hull city fan, get used to this he’s absolutely useless and a lazy fuck too