Alanna T.S.

The only time I set the bar low is for limbo. 😉 mama to ruby and baby Joey!

[Alanna T.S. @pieonthewall_]

I. Can’t. Even. 💕😍

[Alanna T.S. @pieonthewall_]

#NewProfilePic

[Alanna T.S. @pieonthewall_]

Check out these hands-free shoes by @wearkizik! The Easiest Shoes You'll Ever Put On https://t.co/kZxGJOameg

[Jared Cook @jkimballcook]

This right here is why we keep food storage. It's not so you can hoard it from your neighbors; it's so you can share it with your neighbors.

https://t.co/7g4HVeLXlA

[Tyler @tmonson23]

“I wasn’t allowed to watch SpongeBob as a kid”

Well you’re not a kid anymore, so what’s your excuse?

Educate yourselves, SpongeBob is culture

[Boze Herrington, Library Owl 😴🧙‍♀️ @SketchesbyBoze]

everyone should be given one of these at the age of sixteen in lieu of a car

[Zach Zimmerman @zzdoublezz]

“can you explain this gap on ur resume” it was then that Jesus carried me

[Kevin Daly @kevinddaly]

Betty White's impression of Bea Arthur took me out.

[julia @juliashiplett]

iPhone Photos will make a lil movie of the saddest month of your life w/o your permission

[Joyce Karam @Joyce_Karam]

UPDATE: Facebook , Insta, WhatsApp Outage

• 4 hours, ongoing
• NYT: unlikely a hack; FB employees unable to enter building in a.m
• Servers likely behind problem: CTO
• Facebook stocks 📉
• Zuckerberg lost $7 billion: Bloomberg
• Global loss > $160 million/hr: @netblocks

[Mohamad Safa @mhdksafa]

I don't know who needs to hear this but Polio and smallpox never reached natural herd immunity. They were eradicated by vaccines.

[KFC @kfc]

And the Colonel said to the little biscuit, “you are made of the stuff of stars.”

[❃ miss madie jean ❃ @missmadiejean]

Apparently nut heists are actually a thing and I’m going to be thinking about the phrase “pistachios don’t have serial numbers” until the day I die

[McDonald's @McDonalds]

if u ever feel alone, remember that everyone still loves the last fry in the bag

[Luke Mones @LukeMones]

My neighbor said “I think the earth might be flat, sorry if I’m not politically correct.” no you’re just regular incorrect

[Niccole Thurman @niccolethurman]

wow this dude got yeeted into his dream job

[❃ miss madie jean ❃ @missmadiejean]

Literally everyone I’ve met who’s lactose intolerant is like “I’ve tasted death and I’m going back for more” and I think that’s terrifying

[Alanna T.S. @pieonthewall_]

@karandaland 🤔🤔🤔