Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻

Giving a slightly twisted view on the world.

All views are my own and may not be shared by whoever I happen to work for

[Pure Electric @pureelectric_uk]

🏁 Win a one-of-a-kind scooter signed by Lando Norris & Oscar Piastri, wrapped in McLaren’s 1000GP livery 🧡

Free entry 👉 https://t.co/DKTcEmkVlW

Like, follow & share for extra chances. Ends 6 July.

18+. T&Cs apply.

[Jeremy Clarkson @JeremyClarkson]

@caroldecker @Keir_Starmer Custard is useful. Half cunt half bastard.

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

@Pompey Ok, so we clearly ain't good enough to challenge for anything this season - Southampton are losing against clubs we have already beaten and are below us still.
Finish above them, fingers crossed they get relegated - that'll do me

[Jesus H Christ! @ThatBloke_Jesus]

Big shout out to Jeremy from Newcastle who just thanked me because he thought he had run out of toilet paper but then found a full roll behind the Pantene

Anytime Jezza! I got you!

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

So this is how it feels to be lonely
This is how it feels to be small
This is how it feels when your word means nothing at all

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

2 3/4 hour drive to work today thanks to roadworks on the M3 and an accident, then suffer a whack to the side of my face at work (complete accident) that nearly knocked me out and then a puncture on the way home!
Glad to see the end of the day

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

What a hugely hysterical club Southampton are, never cease to amaze me how shit they actually are!
£55 million spent in the transfer window and were out played at home by Pompey who had spent only £5 million!

[OasisGallagherFan @OasisLGNGFan]

I HAVE NO WORDS

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

@thecloneroses They paid for the tickets, they do what they want!!
Fucking hell...

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

@rickygervais You are a good man Ricky and a comedic genius - don't ever change!!!
Your honesty is so refreshing

[Football Away Days @FBAwayDays]

Oasis tonight at the end of live forever in Cardiff.

❤️

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

@NoContextHumans Well they can add traffic free on their tourist videos!

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

@SkyNews Does anyone else think this has been the plan all along??

I definitely do!!

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

@OasisLGNGFan The whole thing is literally a show remember...

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

@NoContextHumans A bin

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

Hello??

Hello???

It's good to be back,

Good to be back!!

My head is in a better place now, but I can't guarantee my tweets will necessarily make any sense!

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

Deleting this app now, anyone who wants to contact then if you actually know me you'll have my details - phone, email etc

Fed up of all the toxic posts and irrelevant rubbish on here!

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

@Alphafox78 Die rather rapidly?

[Lord Ali Matchett of Sealand 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇱🇻 @plasticstoat]

@ElonMuskOde Always

[Inevitable West @Inevitablewest]

🚨BREAKING: The petition for a General Election has BROKEN the record for the fastest time to reach 100k signatures—previously held by ‘Justice for George Floyd’ on https://t.co/aZaV9FQqQk.

Poetic. The British have had enough.