currently paying the price for sulking in a hot tub for almost seven hours on and off, even briefly passing out (all flesh above water level is covered in bug bites)
my wife has left to spend the weekend with her boyfriend and i’m taking a million slutty selfies by the pool and writing to make up for lost time while the wedding party is at the farewell brunch. five beers deep i saw the sun rise over and am going to die in this hot tup
for once i did Not take enough pics of myself but it was my first time getting my hair done so ofc i requested btd era lana waves teased to death n turned it so fiercely the wedding photographers demanded an hourlong shoot so i will unfortunately be talking about this look forevr
obviously i was thrilled to officially welcome my baby brother into the fold but this was all just an excuse to put my wife in my helmut on my arm and field all my gay allegations
im not a loud person n i never scream in pillows or wtvr but after wrangling family pics bc the wedding planner n my stupidest aunt failed to i stomped into the bridal dressing room n yelled Once just as four chinese people i’d never seen walked in. so that’s how my wknd is going