sloan

critter | she/her

[sloan @postmasloan]

do i want this or am i just bored?

[sloan @postmasloan]

i no longer date for romance, i date to collect every subaru color

[gumball @gnmball]

i'm like if a girl was an uncle

[sloan @postmasloan]

don’t start the night with palomas unless you want to spend the morning on the floor of your bathroom in the fetal position

[sloan @postmasloan]

once the dust settles in LA and folks begin the process of rebuilding their lives please don’t forget about wildland firefighters.

if you want to support federal firefighters please consider writing your representatives and demand that they get paid a livable wage.

[Watch Duty @watchdutyapp]

@elonmusk Sorry to burst your bubble but there aren't enough men, women, or equipment to deploy enough water to stop wind driven fires like this.

Why don't you take some of that "go to mars" money and actually help rather than Monday morning quarterbacking during a live fire?

[sloan @postmasloan]

if i was a nascar driver i’d simply put that bitch in cruise control

[sloan @postmasloan]

got a concussion the other day while skiing and my dad wanted to check on me:

[sloan @postmasloan]

i hope Cynthia Erivo is having a good day today

[sloan @postmasloan]

the best part about having a terrible memory is i can rewatch shows every couple months

[sloan @postmasloan]

i’m just a normal girl who has normal thoughts all the time

they should give me land mines

[sloan @postmasloan]

asking for my snapchat?? at 24?? we’re adults. ask for my minecraft username.

[sloan @postmasloan]

most of y’all wouldn’t get caught in this trap and it shows

[sloan @postmasloan]

partied too hard at the disco the bouncer cut my wristband off and put x’s on my hands

[sloan @postmasloan]

me going to the chinese takeout place once again to get the same order i always get (the hostess knows me by name now)

[sloan @postmasloan]

at a diner in utah and a group of mormons walked in right after a group of hunters and i’m really disappointed they didn’t start singing and dancing like the sharks and the jets

[sloan @postmasloan]

every time i meet the perfect girl it’s just three raccoons in a trench coat that rob me again

[sloan @postmasloan]

multitasking

(having a fresca and an iced coffee at the same time)

[sloan @postmasloan]

grammar is not my strong suit i’ve realized

[sloan @postmasloan]

currently trying to find sheet music for an a fancy event and the website is tempting me so hard rn