Pretentious Designer

Creative visionary with a distaste for everything

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

“I’m updating my portfolio” is the design equivalent of “I’m going on a diet.”

[ADWEAK @adweak]

BREAKING: Agency's New Global Creative Director Brings 3 Years Of Experience To Team

[عابد @NasheedWallace]

no one:
some guy on LinkedIn:

Yesterday, I interviewed an excellent candidate. But he seemed poor. I do not like that. I told him he does not deserve to be happy. He wept, “Please King, I am a human!” I thought, “Wow, he is a human.” I hired him. A learned a lesson: I am great.

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

💀

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

Product owners be like:

"3 buttons: ✅"

[zach lieberman @zachlieberman]

this interface

[kyle turman @kyleturman]

So you're tellin' me a user centered this design?

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

Wondering what the threshold is between something getting designed by committee vs. actually receiving dignified treatment as a designer? Just take a look at state flags vs. national flags. TLDR if you're designing anything smaller than a national campaign, you're fucked.

[hell homer 2 @gloibin]

When you ask a friend "what's left to do in life", he says "procreate", and it takes you a full 3 HOURS to realize he meant the verb, not the app: THAT'S .@Pretentiousdsgn

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

Need help solving a problem? Post a job req and have hopeful candidates perform a design test. Take that work and drop the req #problemsolved #uxdesign

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

@InVisionApp received your invite to the #invisionstudio trial! I have some feedback for you.

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

Annoyingly over-enthusiastic coworker:
"Yay, is everyone ready to review their low-fi prototypes!?"

Me:

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

Most designers have a difficult time knowing when something is “done”. The answer: when you’re out of time.

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

Product lifecycle:

Designed in the USA.

Made in China.

Consumed in Europe.

Complained on Twitter.

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

Being politically correct is anti-design. If we are forced to consider your feelings when criticizing your shit work, how will you understand the gravity of your shit?

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

@justincarroll Look no further.

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

Shoutout to all my auto-kerns for opting out optically #scrubs

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

That coworker that’s “in the office 2 hours before AND after everyone else” yet you can’t ever find them.

[hell homer 2 @gloibin]

One for @Pretentiousdsgn

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

To be good, you must first be bad. To be bad, you’ll continue wireframing in illustrator.

[Pretentious Designer @Pretentiousdsgn]

Thanks for voting everyone. Now if you can make me a PPT on why this was valuable, that would be greaaaaat. #bathroomduty