Calvin

give me internet points

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@crybabyzay I literally just watched this last night. It was a lot of monkey business. Can’t wait for the new one.

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@carelesstitty No you’re not. You’re being crazy

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@crybabyzay Keep drinking your milk and stretching. You might be able to grow to 5’9

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@big_medium_ Stay healthy, eat healthy, do healthy 😤😤🫡

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

The closest place to me with bottomless mimosas is 50 minutes away. This is why I’m sad.

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@Slick_Rick40 @bstategames @nikgeneburn Reported

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@Slick_Rick40 @bstategames @nikgeneburn I say NO BOSS SPAWNS

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@Slick_Rick40 @bstategames @nikgeneburn No

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@crybabyzay How do you pronounce gyro?

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@crybabyzay slap it

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@crybabyzay

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@crybabyzay drop the name, stop gatekeeping

[soul nate @MNateShyamalan]

the best part of sitting in the exit row is when the flight attendant comes by to make you promise not to be a coward

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

whenever i tell a joke, i give everyone 5 seconds to laugh before i start explaining the joke to them

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

my friends are really good at surprise parties. the surprise is that they forget my birthday and the party is me drinking alone 🥳🎈

[𝒶𝓈𝒾𝒶𝒽 @wamoas]

I hate when it’s my birthday cause I just be disappointed the whole entire day lmao

[helena riley @freshhel]

Nachos are so lovely you get to dig around…make choices..learn about yourself and others

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

@crybabyzay you prepping my bedroom?

[Calvin @Professor_Cal]

i’ve told more of my secrets to strangers at airport bars than my own best friends