Professor Stepmother

Tweets from a stepmom who’s teaching college students! Here I say the things I wish I could say out loud to my students and family. (satire)

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

Don’t take me too seriously... I use Twitter as free therapy. #collegeprofessor #stepmother

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

It was driving me crazy trying to figure out who Killian from #theultimatum on #netflix looks like & it’s CT from the Challenge on #mtv.

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

@Verizon things I have done easier than trying to switch to you due to your fraud dept: bought a car/ house, filed taxes, got a real person on the phone w/the IRS, got a doctorate, gave birth, ran a marathon, mourned, shall I continue?

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

@VerizonSupport spent 6 hours on the phone w/ an angel named John. Our order keeps getting turned over to the fraud dept no matter what docs we submitted. He is going to try to help tomorrow b4 my kid leaves for college. Other than John I don’t think Verizon wants my business.

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

@VerizonSupport When? I’ve had to give you guys copies of my ID, deed to the house, & mortgage statement. I could have bought a car easier than switching phone service.

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

@Verizon your CS rep was so rude! He was dead set on trying to prove I was faking my identity. WRONG! We recently moved to a state where your service is better & wanted to switch. Now I’d rather keep my current service despite my phone being an expensive paperweight!

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

Idk who is more delusional, Bonita or whatever the guys name is. Also, if you don’t want your kids to be with a man like you, that should be a HUGE wake up call, dumbass! #loveafterlockup

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

Girl if you think you’re about to tear your hip flexor…stop preforming!! #dcc #dallascowboyscheerleaders You don’t want to feel like you’re 80, when you’re 30, & hurt when you chase the kids around the yard.

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

I’m rewatching #summerhouse from the beginning. I’m on season 8. I CANNOT believe these women are fawning over #west & his horrible mustache when they all first met.

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

Why did they dress THE Annette Bening like Dwight Yoakum!? #duttonranch

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

“Harder, harder” Ian Sterling you cheeky fella! 😂🤣 #loveislandusa

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

Someone please explain to Shamea the difference between punk rock and 80s glam. #rhoa #bravotv

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

Lindsey, “You should feel stupid.” I’m ☠️! 😂 #summerhouse #bravotv

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

Justin from #thedeal looks like Justin Bobby from #thehills, or is it just me?

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

I think Dorit & Emmy are sharing the same delusional brain cell, despite being on different shows. They’re always the victim & are unwilling to listen or accept responsibility. #rhobh #SouthernHospitality

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

@OfficialOPLive not Dan with the Crocodile Dundee reference!! I dig it!

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

Can they not find people who are a little older for #temptationisland? At 24, I didn’t know my head from my asshole either when it came to relationships. I was too busy trying to adult independent from my parents.

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

Ned!? What are you doing on #virginriver? You’re supposed to be in #hopevalley. #whencallstheheart

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

@KateCasey Tell Chris I was aghast when he said Dillards was Sears-ish! It’s no Neimans, but Sears it is not. 😂

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

Everyone go vote for @AshtonJeanty2 for NFL Rookie of the Year! Let show the #boisestate alum some 💙🧡!

[Professor Stepmother @ProfessorStepm1]

@DatelineNBC I’ve never seen Andrea get so upset before on an episode. I was cheering her on from the sofa!