One day it will be recognised that our mood is one way that we pollute the commons; that feelings are not private; that we have a responsibility to the commons & each other to cultivate joy & not be in a gigantic sulk at life all the time. its like defecating in the town water
RIP to Annie Dillard, whose work frequently left me unable to speak sensibly for several minutes after reading it. This essay, This Is The Life, was my entry point to her work
Claude just asked me if we could take a break from editing technical documentation so I could describe to it how the wind coming through the open window next to me feels on my body
@StellaNova_1 Everyone bugging out over a stretch of highway filled with zero parking, max tourists, and influencers playing music on Bluetooth speakers all throughout the bluffs 😂
The father of seven has not finished a thought in four years. he is just moving. feeding. driving. wiping. his brain is soup and his back is finished and he has no opinions about civilization he is too tired for opinions. and meanwhile civilization is growing out of him like he is dirt and he doesnt even notice because there is milk on the floor again. the childfree man has read eleven books this year about the decline of the west and he is the decline and the books are the evidence and he will understand this at fifty eight in a room that is very clean and very quiet
The entire spiritual industry is a coward's invention, designed to package the most violent undertaking a human being can choose into something palatable for soft hands and weekend schedules. the actual practice, the original practice, before it was gutted and resold as self care, involves deliberately breaking your body down as an offering to something that will never confirm it's received the gift. fasting isn't intermittent caloric optimization, it's starving until something inside you cracks open that eating kept shut. prayer isn't meditation apps with bells, it's grinding the same fucking words into your teeth until they bypass your intellect entirely and enter the bloodstream. the desert fathers lived in holes in the ground eating insects, not because they were performing piety, but because they discovered that comfort is the single most efficient mechanism for keeping a man from encountering anything real about himself, or god, or both. every generation produces fewer thousands willing to pay the actual price, and more millions willing to purchase the aesthetic of having paid it
Diminishing window to change course is the most glaring thing in middle age. It’s adjacent to what I said the other day - you don’t get to reinvent yourself over and over until you die if you want to stabilize and have anything meaningul to show for yourself. Gotta lock in and remember that your life is not your own.