BREAKING: Believing himself to be the new Messiah, Donald Trump walks into the Strait of Hormuz to attempt to open it permanently, by parting the seas like Moses did.
American Obituary speaks to the shocking event the world witnessed in Minneapolis, Minnesota on January 7th, 2026 where Renée Nicole Macklin Good, a peaceful protestor, was shot and killed at almost point-blank range by ICE, an arm of her own government. This unarmed mother of three was then described as a “domestic terrorist” by an administration who will not withdraw the description even though they know it’s not true or mount a proper enquiry into what happened for the sake of everyone involved.
Days of Ash EP available now. Read Propaganda here: https://t.co/OB3mVe69vu
If you haven’t seen this bit from Saturday Night Live from last night yet, you absolutely have to. It’s hilarious and at the same time extremely therapeutic. Even if it’s not real. “DO YOU WANT THIS TO BE REAL?”
BREAKING: Music legend Bruce Springsteen just released this incredible song that will be sure to piss Trump off beyond belief.
“Streets of Minneapolis”.
He wrote this song about Alex Pretti and Renée Good Saturday and recorded it yesterday.
Share it far and wide and play it as loud as you can
Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.
$30 per seat per month.
$1.4 million annually.
I called it "digital transformation."
The board loved that phrase.
They approved it in eleven minutes.
No one asked what it would actually do.
Including me.
I told everyone it would "10x productivity."
That's not a real number.
But it sounds like one.
HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.
I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."
They stopped asking.
Three months later I checked the usage reports.
47 people had opened it.
12 had used it more than once.
One of them was me.
I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.
It took 45 seconds.
Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.
But I called it a "pilot success."
Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.
The CFO asked about ROI.
I showed him a graph.
The graph went up and to the right.
It measured "AI enablement."
I made that metric up.
He nodded approvingly.
We're "AI-enabled" now.
I don't know what that means.
But it's in our investor deck.
A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.
I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."
He asked what that meant.
I said "compliance."
He asked which compliance.
I said "all of them."
He looked skeptical.
I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."
He stopped asking questions.
Microsoft sent a case study team.
They wanted to feature us as a success story.
I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."
I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.
They didn't verify it.
They never do.
Now we're on Microsoft's website.
"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."
The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.
He got 3,000 likes.
He's never used Copilot.
None of the executives have.
We have an exemption.
"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."
I wrote that policy.
The licenses renew next month.
I'm requesting an expansion.
5,000 more seats.
We haven't used the first 4,000.
But this time we'll "drive adoption."
Adoption means mandatory training.
Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.
But completion will be tracked.
Completion is a metric.
Metrics go in dashboards.
Dashboards go in board presentations.
Board presentations get me promoted.
I'll be SVP by Q3.
I still don't know what Copilot does.
But I know what it's for.
It's for showing we're "investing in AI."
Investment means spending.
Spending means commitment.
Commitment means we're serious about the future.
The future is whatever I say it is.
As long as the graph goes up and to the right.
Hey everyone! For those interested in AI, just wanted to share that there’s an event happening tomorrow evening at 18:30 in St. Julian’s focused on kicking off a new AI community and event series here in Malta. @joinelevateai
https://t.co/dtEq1IO1Z3
A European founder asked to meet up with me
His startup is only 7 years old but just hit €7,000 MRR
Incredibly fast growth
I applied for a meeting permit with the EU government to ask permission to meet him for coffee
5 months later, the EU government gave the go-ahead and charged a €75 VAT fee
We finally met up yesterday and had an insightful, yet quick 4 hour coffee chat during business hours
I decided to invest €15k into his business
Just got word that it's the 4th-largest venture investment in the EU this year
I expect he'll do great things and turn this startup into one of the EU's largest businesses
I could even imagine it breaking the €500k annual revenue mark someday (yes, it's a long shot, but it could happen)
Never been more excited to be building in the EU
1/ "Most AI founders chase funding before customers. Fatal mistake.
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@1Nicdar Fish & chips would be my first candidate, fruit cake right up there though…and yes I have tried both in supposedly all the right places once a year or so for decades. Used to hate liver but now I love it, maybe the other two will convert me one day😅
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