Tokyo rent isn’t cheap, that elite school isn’t cheap, raising a king on your own isn’t cheap, emotionally or otherwise. You’re carrying weight most people would collapse under and you’re still smiling, that's not just strength, its grace under fire. Real respect👏
So when a man says he wants “calm submission,” I understand why it feels like an insult. After everything you’ve survived without a co pilot, being asked to “submit” probably sounds like “now undo all your armor and hope I don’t hurt you.”
But a lot of men aren’t asking you to shrink. They r asking if there’s still room to protect something, to lead in some small way like covering, direction, peace etc..above all.
And when that offer gets read as control… they quietly walk away. Not because you’re “too strong,” but because they don’t know how to stay without feeling useless.
That’s why you’ll see the rapper, the doctor, the tech bro, the ones who beat the odds, end up marrying the white girl who grew up watching her dad be the calm center of the house. She never had to prove she could do it all alone, so she never minded letting him try. I promise a lot men aren’t looking for a servant. They are just men praying there’s still one woman left who believes a man can be safe to lean on.
I hope one day we both learn how to meet in the middle before there’s nobody left who still believes in “we”.”
Makokwa nemukuru🙂
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