pyjokes

Pining for the fjords. One-line programmer jokes (jokes-as-a-service).

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There are 10 types of people: those who understand hexadecimal and 15 others.

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Hardware: The part of a computer that you can kick.

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A programmer walks into a bar and orders 1.38 root beers. The bartender informs her it's a root beer float. She says 'Make it a double!'

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There are 10 types of people: those who understand binary, those who don't, and those who were expecting this joke to be in trinary.

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I had a problem so I thought I'd use Java. Now I have a ProblemFactory.

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Schrodinger's attitude to web development: If I don't look at it in Internet Explorer then there's a chance it looks fine.

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Obfuscated Reality Mappers (ORMs) can be useful database tools.

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Why did the QA cross the road? To ruin everyone's day.

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A programmer crashes a car at the bottom of a hill, a bystander asks what happened, he says "No idea. Let's push it back up and try again".

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Number of days since I have encountered an array index error: -1.

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My friend's in a band called '1023 Megabytes'... They haven't got a gig yet!

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A programmer had a problem. He thought to himself, 'I know, I'll solve it with threads!'. has Now problems. two he

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Unix is user friendly. It's just very particular about who its friends are.

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Hardware: The part of a computer that you can kick.

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In C we had to code our own bugs. In C++ we can inherit them.

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Waiter: He's choking! Is anyone a doctor? Programmer: I'm a Vim user.

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There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third one works.

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.NET was named .NET so that it wouldn't show up in a Unix directory listing.

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How come there is no obfuscated Perl contest? Because everyone would win.

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What does 'Emacs' stand for? 'Exclusively used by middle aged computer scientists.'