ؘ

clair: she/her, twenty six. slow

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

poetry and stuff of dreams.✨
https://t.co/QvohE8Rnvl

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

im not even joking

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

richard siken how do you even cope with grief the size of your chest drowning in words you can never say, you can never breathe

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

the holy sorrow in familiar words,
foreign grunts and murmurs.

i couldn't.

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

so, my grandfather died.

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

i think i understand what love looks like:
supple skin smoothing wrinkles on
earth-like expanse, ironing the cracks
and edges marred by misery,
insisting gentleness,
the kind that was learned,
nurtured, instead of
the break that was necessary to
heal;

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

dreams—of names and sons and a
future brighter
than the bleak horizon
at a standstill.

when the nurse told me to
guide him, to whisper Allah in
his ears like prayer beads falling
with held-back tears,

i couldn't

i wanted to—but my tongue
couldn't taste the devotion,

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

i know we haven't
talked much lately; your name
half written in
the margins of the scripts
the actors enacted on stage,

i couldn't bear
the shame of crawling back to your shores,
begging for hope in these sterile floors, drinking penance out of
bitter absolution

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

i lost my ring in the hospital bathroom. it's gold, old, and well-worn,
bent to a disfigured oval-shaped,

i wondered what i did to
deserve such a misfortune
(i took and took and took),

i wondered what it would take
to wipe the tiles clean,

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

time and time again i prayed
for self-serving blessings
(i need and need and need),

i wondered what it
would take to
wipe the tiles clean,
would words carry
the weight of penance
and regret the same way
a prayer could
wash away sins from the shores of my faux-faith?

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

steady hands holding the unsteady,
strong hands leading the strayed,
asking him to come back, appealing
to death for a better contract,
bid the time until
their hearts could rest easy
or until guilt thawed their resolve

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

i think i understand what love looks like:
supple skin smoothing wrinkles on
earth-like expanse, ironing the cracks
and edges marred by misery,
insisting gentleness,
the kind that was learned,
nurtured, instead of
the break that was necessary to
heal;

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

in the hands of a sinner from which supplication overflowed and
desperation poured as
her tears
fell,
yelling to deafened ears
of toils and blessings, the neverending
exchange of gold and life,
of a parent and a child,
a cycle of demand and take;

[love drops @lovedropx]

— Anaïs Nin

[The woman @Tarmeim]

Love is in observation !

[Richard Siken @richardsiken]

Y'all are so funny. Crossover? I live in the same world you do. I know about BTS. I know about everything.

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

i had a dream where i loved and i grieved
a faceless face in an unrecognized terrain
i had a dream where i left things unsaid
and regret clots like blood in a swelling vein

[ؘ @qlairdelune]

love, love, love, and its bloody consequences