Crow Quotes

My friend, The Crow, says some amazing things. I thought you would enjoy this.

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

Did you see “Mr. Hollis Open?” He’s a music teacher, but his kid is death.
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

“Christmas is almost here.” (Today is July 5. Literally as far from December 25 as you can get in either direction on the calendar)
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

Crow asks google on his phone what a “klutz” is. The phone starts defining “clitoris”
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

“I feel hikstetic. Do you ever feel hikstetic?”
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

“If my arm ever gets cut off, I’ll have to get a prostate arm.”
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

We’re trying to explain D.B. Cooper to crow. He asks google on his phone: “who was the guy that got away with jacking off a plane?”
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

When I die, I wanna die nice and slow.
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

Does your neighbor still live by you?
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

#crowquotes #duckquotes #selfportrait

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

I was always a stray A student.
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

#crowquotes #ruidosodowns

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

2/2
Me: So is her new house a trailer house?
Crow: No. it’s a double wide.
#crowquotes #twofer

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

Crow: My next door neighbor had her house torn down, but now her new house isn’t coming until June.
Me: So, where is she living?
Crow: She lives next door.
1/2
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

Me on August 1st: oh, I need to change my calendar.
Crow: I changed mine before I woke up.
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

Crow: at Disneyland I met Chip and Dale.
Me: the chipmunks or the male strippers?
Crow: Well, they weren’t wearing any clothes.
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

Crow: Looks like Emily left her phone here.
Dan: Well, did you call her and tell her it’s here?
Crow: ... umm...
#crowquotes #danquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

Crow: You’re family if you watch each other pee.
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

Crow: I can’t find my jacket. I think someone took it.
L.T. : What does it look like?
Crow: I don’t know, I’d have to see it.
#crowquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

L.T.: How late do you work today?
Weazel: Till 7 or 8, whichever comes first.
#crowquotes #weazelquotes

[Crow Quotes @QuotesFromCrow]

*horse drawn carriage shown cruising at Santa Anita racetrack...
Crow: I think the queen must be there or something.
#crowquotes