Sum

[juulie albright ♡ (she/her) @juuliealbright]

the person who let me pass my drivers test deserves jail time for endangering the public

[Pete Lee @kungfupete]

The Wailing is the greatest horror film in the last 40 years. We don’t talk about The Wailing enough. The Wailing is my Heat.

[It's All Indie 🎶 @Its_All_Indie]

Nashville based @weakdazeca share their thrilling new track, "Sleeping Awake"
// https://t.co/TB35zXSyMq

[Lisa Beasley @lisabevolving]

I really wish we could eliminate “What do you do?” as the key indicator of how to treat someone especially after only knowing them for literally 12 seconds.

[Denis B. Huppert 🇫🇷 @dennisbhooper]

I’ve had mangoes that were better than entire years of my life

[ms pippershnippetz @lolumOKUR]

just want my husband and boyfriend to get along

[zach zucker @Zach_Zucker]

me: next time I ain’t fuckin around

next time roll around: ok i be fuckin around

[Francheska @HeyFranHey]

I envy those of you who knock out as soon as you close your eyes.

[Charlene deGuzman @charstarlene]

Every morning I wake up I think, “ok,”and every night I go to sleep I’m like, “ok,”

[dana donnelly @danadonnelly]

i hate that all dog training is geared toward like making your dog see you as alpha. i don’t wanna be alpha! let my dog be in charge. for god’s sake so what if he is the boss around here

[♥mark magark♥ @markedly]

hey quick q is anyone else losing their entire mind

[clintoris @clintoris]

The government should send everyone $5000 and a blunt

[james tom @jestom]

lol remember when I was like well *I* won't have another pandemic bday 😏

[sloane (sîpihkopiyesîs) 🇵🇸🇨🇩🇸🇩 @cottoncandaddy]

I’m the dad friend which is like the mom friend but instead of taking care of people I don’t answer texts and I know a thousand extremely specific facts that are in no way useful ever