Ralph D'Annise

I like the '85 Bears.

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

Now that's funny! #tellittomyballs

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

We built this city! We built this city on Rock and Roll!

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

I just saw my hero's jersey get retired. Coach Mike Ditka of the '85 Bears!

[veronica belmont @Veronica]

We got mad at this bar for switching the A’s game to football, so @serafinak turned off the TV with her phone. #nerdrage

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

I'm picking My Nose for the Derby.

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

I'm glad they caught that asshole.

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

Guess what? Pork butt.

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

Kegs float, right? #SandySpareTheBeer

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

You are not Fancy.

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

You can never have enough bacon.

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

Fight gravity!

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

Notice how Asparagus and Piss rhyme? A coincidence? I think not.

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

Forgive me if you are a friend of mine, but if you have those spacer rings in your earlobes, you look like a douchebag.

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

Chinese food has a shelf life of seven minutes.

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

Apparently you can say "vagina" and "douche" on prime time TV these days.

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

The zipper on my pants just broke. Hot dog sale!

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

Toots just told me that Delaware's a small town.

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

"When I see what I want I get right to the BS." - Alan Harper

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

I'm into nuggets y'all

[Ralph D'Annise @ralphdannise]

Pulled up to a fast food drive through and tried to place an order in the trash can.