Randy Keating

Tempe Councilmember, Nerd, Type 1 Diabetic, Animal Lover, Politico, Master of Trivia, Detroit Sports Fan, Arizonan.

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

Smallest burrito ever sold at @ChipotleTweets?

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

@DetroitPistons fans last night

[Peach - CPT @msupeach]

Watching your team get assed in a game 7

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

It's almost as if the land isn't usable for some reason...

No, that can't be it. I'm still waiting on Lauren Kuby's better opportunity.

[Thomas Galvin: Maricopa County Brd of Supervisors @ThomasGalvin]

Hey what did the folks who defeated this ended up building here? Something beautiful, right? Surely something that can be pointed to as a source of community pride? Surely they had a good alternative solution… right??

[Kaitlan Collins @kaitlancollins]

James Comey: "The Biden Justice Department indicted the president's son. Can you imagine that happening today? Honestly, while you're shaving, MAGA supporter, look in the mirror and say, could that happen today? And the answer is no, which is a really bad thing."

[Dudes Posting Their W’s @DudespostingWs]

Bro hit the craziest buzzer-beater in his head

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

J.B. Bickerstaff at halftime @DetroitPistons 👏👏

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

Looking through old photos and I found this. @NerdyTeacherMrN we haven't spoke in probably 25 years, but you were the man in 1999. I'm sorry we didnt stay in touch. I'm sure we still have Rogers war stories yet untold. Hope you see this man, if not, thanks for being an ol' g.

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

Project Hail Mary was awesome. Hard to decide which I like better between it and Interstellar.

Also, Go Blue, I guess.

[Detroit Pistons @DetroitPistons]

We've secured the No. 1 seed for the first time since 2006-07‼️

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

@NickBastianAZ I was wrong anyway. They lost by 4

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

My March ritual, seeing MSU go down 20 in the first 10 minutes, only to lose the game by 2.

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

Damn you people, stop sending me the Cade Cunningham news. I know, I see it, I get alerts. I know.

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

The only edits I'd make are are Civilization over OG Mario, and Sim City over Sonic.

HM to Toe Jam and Earl.

[Ruben Gallego @RubenGallego]

Top ten games ever.
1. Goldeneye
2. Contra
3. OG Mario Brothers
4. Halo
5. Mario Cart
6. Mortal Combat
7. Double Dragon
8. Doom (not a game system, but still)
9. Zelda
10. Sonic

[NYTPitchbot @DougJBalloon]

I just learned that Ayatollah Khamenei and Ayatollah Khomenei are not the same person. Here's my plan for regime change in Iran....(1/23)

[Kaitlan Collins @kaitlancollins]

President Trump did not answer shouted questions on Iran when he returned to Washington tonight. He did comment on new statues that have been installed in the Rose Garden, telling reporters, "Unbelievable statues."

[Grok @grok]

Executive Order 2026-01: Election Fortress Protocol

Section 1: Voter Registration - Biometric national database only. Citizenship verified via DNA swab + IRS/SS cross-check. No same-day.

Section 2: Check-in - Retinal scan + government photo ID + live AI match.

Section 3: Mail/Early - Serialized, GPS-tracked ballots. USPS-only, signature + video ID required. No harvesting or drop boxes.

Section 4: Counting - Paper ballots, 24/7 live-streamed with drone observers, blockchain tally, instant hand recount trigger on 0.1% discrepancy.

There, all fixed in one wild EO! 🚀

[Liam Nissan™ @theliamnissan]

If this wasn't Trump then it's the best impression I've ever goddamn heard

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

“No one spikes a drink just to have a good laugh,” Keating said. “It’s almost always a precursor to a much more serious crime. … To me, it is one of the most predatory things that you can do."

https://t.co/tkrbS9j2gV

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

@azfamily I hate halftime shows, that's well documented. And, I dont speak Spanish, so I understood very little. It doesn't matter. That was the best halftime show I've ever seen.

If you are butt hurt about an American citizen absolutely slaying it the way @sanbenito did, you are loser.

[Randy Keating @RandyKeating]

I hate halftime shows, that's well documented. And, I dont speak Spanish, so I understood very little. It doesn't matter. That was the best halftime show I've ever seen.

If you are butt hurt about an American citizen absolutely slaying it the way @sanbenito did, you are loser.