After giving birth, a woman's internal wounds take six months to heal, 12 months for physical recovery, two years for hormonal balance, and up to five years to rediscover her identity. Relationships frequently fail during this time due to a lack of understanding. Be kind and patient with new mothers; they are facing more challenges than it appears.
You never forget how someone supports or makes you feel during pregnancy, postpartum, miscarriage/childloss, loss of a parent/sibling, grief in general. It stays with you and changes the way you see that person for life.
When you in a serious relationship, you’re suppose to move differently. Yeah you grown you can do whatever you want, but certain things are out of respect you have for your partner! It’s not about being controlled or about your partner being insecure it’s a respect thing.
Listening to your partner.
Guys especially, listen to her complaints. Allow her express her emotions, validate those emotions before proffering solutions. It allows you share in whatever she feels.
Sometimes, proffering solutions in between her rants can come off as dismissive.
Compromising.
Your partner prefers video calls while you prefer voice calls? Mix it up. Put it on par so both of you enjoy a fair balance.
Respect & boundaries.
No relationship survives the test of time without them.
Reading the atmosphere, understanding moods, & knowing the right time for everything makes your partner feel safe rather than choked.
Whenever your heart truly wants something to happen, say this:
اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَسْأَلُكَ مِنَ الْخَيْرِ كُلِّهِ، عَاجِلِهِ وَآجِلِهِ
Allahumma innī as’aluka minal khayri kullihi, ‘ājilihi wa ājilihi
O Allah, I ask You for all good, it’s immediate and it’s delayed.
I prefer face to face conversations. I prefer dates. I prefer quality alone time together. Texting will never replace the warmth of sitting across from someone, watching their eyes light up, hearing the laughter that follows a good joke.
Texting is bad for real connection. You misunderstand things. You misread words. You cannot hear the tone. You cannot see the mood they are in at that exact moment. A short reply feels cold, even when it was never meant that way. A lack of response feels like rejection, even when they were simply busy. Misunderstandings grow. Small issues become bigger than they should be. All because of a few poorly typed words.
But in person, none of that exists. You see the smile. You hear the warmth. You know when they are tired, when they are happy, when they need a moment of silence. You do not have to guess. You can simply be.
That is why I value real dates. Real time together. Not endless texts that leave room for doubt.
Arafah is coming. It's time to be "delusional" in your Dua. Ask Al-Wahhab for the impossible. Hazrat Suleman (AS) asked for a kingdom that no one else could ever own. If He can give a kingdom to him, He can rewrite your entire destiny. Be greedy, ask for everything
Be a communicator.
The moment theres a drop in communication, thats the day it starts jerking.
Express your feelings.
Say how you feel about your partner often. Expressing your emotions & reminding them of the many reasons why you'll always stick with them makes them feel safe and alive.
Be kind & empathetic.
Listen carefully to understand, know how & when to speak. The right choice of words will go a long way.
Don't be rigid.
Plan out dates, try new places for dates. Dates every two weeks or once in a month would help breathe new life into the relationship.