phoebeus bridgerus

You're all just figments of my over active imagination. Твоя Мать

[Sylvia Plath's Food Diary @whatsylviaate]

The kittens are nosey, lean into my coffee cup, sneeze at the hot strong stuff and go skittering across the floor. 8/19/52

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

I’ve ruined many a romantic relationship by giving too jovial a fraternal slap on the back.

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

women love a well hydrated man!

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

@sabfry can you name a single other puffed snack

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

this whole app is living in 2018

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

@bjxnes3 so true i’m always wondering

[💬 @molotovbeer]

so i asked this girl to ruin my life but instead she has enriched it and made every single day better just for having known her?

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

i haven’t felt like a real person for a long time

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

@farmharlot stop

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

Eating my meijer food court boneless wings, pretending I’m at Applebee’s

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

Going feral @ the Bed Bath & Beyond going out of business sale

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

@farmharlot fax

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

@yungbrodger I love these, especially 2 & 3

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

@kalynn_simpkins no

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

@anneliesegerg the WHAT

[sydney @demiurgently]

my ducks? in a row. ordered. disciplined. behaving predictably.
your ducks? scattered. in disarray. waddling aimlessly. desperate for a leader to impose structure.

pathetic.

[Sylvia Plath's Food Diary @whatsylviaate]

After 20 beers or so, he finally realized I existed. 12/11/50

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

to be a guy is so simple. you literally have to exist without controversy

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

@andwataboutitt As you should 🤝 〽️

[phoebeus bridgerus @realJudgeJudy69]

@mistermamas something ab the alewife train was always so tempting