A Bert Hayes

All media is hypnosis. None of my opinions are really my own. Please, do not feed the robots. he/him

[A Bert Hayes @realberthayes]

This place fucking sucks.

[A Bert Hayes @realberthayes]

@facetedcarapace Hell yeah

[Andrew Hilary🇵🇸 @AndrewHilaryUS]

Has anyone considered asking those kids who were speedrunning the Scientology centers to head down to whatever hospital Mitch McConnell is supposedly in?

[IEMBot EWX @iembot_ewx]

EWX upgrades Heat Advisory to Extreme Heat Warning valid at Jul 22, 12:00 PM CDT for Bastrop, Fayette, Lavaca, Lee, Travis, Williamson [TX] till Jul 22, 8:00 PM CDT https://t.co/IBEXbkWkaU

[Bill Bramhall @BillBramhall]

Cartoon

[SwiftOnSecurity @SwiftOnSecurity]

This is probably so much easier than how you're doing it right now https://t.co/4nSR9EOrjJ

[A Bert Hayes @realberthayes]

@goddammitsarah Dog food. Cat food. Yes.

[A Bert Hayes @realberthayes]

@olgakhazan @evan7257 Don’t forget to tip [your cup of milk over]!

[A Bert Hayes @realberthayes]

For all of the neck tattoos, these guys are kinda pussies after they hit the grass.

[Fat Tony @Tony_Baloney69]

You can just take flock cameras. Your tax dollars paid for them, they are legally your property. @Flock_Safety cant stop you.

[rish @rish_neynar]

asked my ai agent to book a dentist appointment

the dentist's agent moved it by 30 minutes

mine rejected the change and proposed three alternatives

theirs added a cancellation fee

mine disputed it with american express

the two agents are now in arbitration

my tooth still hurts

[🏈 emily🌲 @emilyofeasttx]

watching The Odyssey again

[wigle net @wiglenet]

AAAAND WE'RE OFF!

The @defcon 34 @rfhackers World Wide War Drive has begun.
It's not to late to register, but you'd better hurry!

You can follow the standings at:
https://t.co/0xD4o6TBxT

[A Bert Hayes @realberthayes]

Weather in #ATX has me saying it’s “rainin’ to beat the band” all week. Tried to explain to my son but couldn’t find my copy of Burning Chrome by @GreatDismal. Had to panic-buy another and get it shipped overnight.

HFS - It’s even better than I remember (The Belonging Kind).

[𝔐𝔢𝔤𝔞𝔫 🐈‍⬛ @saint_witch_]

Odysseus describing his 20 years away to Penelope

[Tatsuya Tanaka 田中達也 @tanaka_tatsuya]

食パンの袋に生息するクワガタ

[dandelion georgism 🔰🏗 @DandyGeorgism]

1995: oh cool you can buy books online now

2026: the company that owns Whole Foods and Lord of the Rings is experiencing setbacks with its space program