Slam dong

Luv rolling burritos almost as big as my dong at salsa mamas, smacking swords with the boyz, and rippin mean farts as soon as the elevator door closes #dickbarf

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

@alex_goldbach I want someone to tackle me like a horse.

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

I miss you @RyszykowAlex

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Big dick energy

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Peepee poopoo

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

I heart you subtronics

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

@cloutieh @SLagattuta I’m pooping too

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Long time no see my fellow dongers

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Did I shit myself when I sneezed at work earlier? Yeah.
Did I come prepared with 3 extra pairs of pants in my car, bracing for this exact situation to happen, possibly multiple times? Also yes.
So, my fellow coworkers, who’s the “weird bitch” now??🤔

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

@cr0driguezz I took a dump in the shower for the 1st time ever today and it was awesome. I would totally recommend it

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Today was fucking awesome! I knew it was gonna be a great day right from the start. One of those “treat yourself” days. I woke up, took a shit, then got out of bed and it’s been nothing short of relaxing. I suggest everyone take a day to rest and relax! #feelinggood

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Instagram is lit btw

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Let’s get this Thursday off on the right dong!

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

@alex_goldbach @bibbitybabs Is it just me or do I want to fuck cartoon Bobby Babs?

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Anyone else’s finger smell weird after they scratch their brown hole?

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

When all your friends invite you out to dinner but it really just ends up being an intervention to get you to stop purposely clogging the toilet to make friends with the plumber

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Third day in the new house and this is the fifth time the plumber has been here... get used to it pal these dumps are gonna have you workin OVERTIME

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

@aRyszykow18 @ me next time!

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Anyone wanna come to my new place and gas up these new rooms with toots?

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Today’s the day I’m breaking the poo record. I can feel it. Already on my 4th

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

@peter_borgie You are the goat

[Slam dong @realsamlags69]

Got an extra $160 anyone wanna hit the casino or buy a llama or 2??