Tyler N Thoreson

popular with middle aged women

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

Cults in Saint Charles, MN
-Guys who drive their tractors to high school
-club members of https://t.co/bTDEPE9P9z.D
-The cross country team
-The A&W employees
-The Cabin Coffee Moms
-Mr Derby and Mr Drescher
-The One Act Play kids
-Mikes Grocery store employees
-The Heim family https://t.co/oTv31ThWwx

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

genesis 1:1 Don't worry, be happy

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

16 years later and I still have a crush on Aaron Samuels

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

Is he depressed or is he just an eboy

[Sydney Loechler @sydthepisces]

Me and @realtylernathan across the street from eachother waiting for the #StayAtHomeOrder to be lifted

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

Carl walked so Kim K could run

[Logan Paul @LoganPaul]

in an attempt to make your quarantine NOT suck, I’m doing a $10,000 giveaway! randomly selecting 10 people to donate $1,000, just RETWEET this for a chance to win💰

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

Me, getting together with friends for brunch after corona has ended and the world has recovered

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

Hey @netflix let’s make a reality show called “is it love or is it just quarantine”

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

I read a quote by Helen Keller today that said, “the only thing worse than being blind is having no vision” and all I could think about was how could she possibly tell the difference

[Astro Poets @poetastrologers]

Quit your job. Shave your head. Fall in love with a stranger. Live exactly the life you want. Happy Sagittarius season.

[Kyle 🌱 @KylePlantEmoji]

Nobody:

Theatre majors: TO SIT IN SOLEMN SILENCE IN A DULL DARK DOCK IN A PESTILENTIAL PRISON WITH A LIFE LONG LOCK

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

Me: *mentions cute female coworker*
My mom, still holding onto straight me: YOU SHOULD MARRY HER

[JDRandom - RandomWhiteGuy @TheReelRandom]

@realDonaldTrump Your ignorance of our own beliefs amazes me! This from Lady Liberty.

“Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free.”

You’re a fool without a clue.

[Astro Poets @poetastrologers]

Sagittarius at 2pm: I fucking love you you’re my favorite person in the world
Sagittarius at 2am:

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

Pregnant coworker, whispering quietly: I heard being pregnant makes you crave dick more

Me, quite loudly: damn I must be pregnant 365 days out of the year

[Cindy (readwithcindy.com) @readwithcindy]

[during sex]

Me: hurt me

Him: your obsession with books doesn't make you quirky or intelligent, you just seek fiction as escapism from your own life

Me: wait

Him: you root for character development and relationships in stories because you're unable to cultivate your own

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

@katiecookies @ewarren Privatized prisons sure, but you want to ban prisons altogether? Would you prefer to take the convicted murderers & other felons into your home instead? 🤔

[Tyler N Thoreson @realtylernathan]

@jakegylles Sag/Shape of Water