Reasonable Person

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

You got a fast car
I got a plan to get us out of here

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

It’s Jake from Two and a Half Men

[Fahhh @wtfahhh0]

who tf is that decimal person 😭

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

ACAB includes the receipt checker at Walmart

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

Joseph Kitchenette Biden

[Old Man Rattle @OldRattleMan]

naming my son kitchenette

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

Mike’s Flaccid Lemonade

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

Italian rapper named Fetty Wop

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

What’s a good watch for someone just getting into telling time?

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

When I am President, we will have free iCloud storage for all

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

White people be like my dog has an emotional support animal

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

21 goon salute

[Chris 𝕏 @cwchris_]

Stay safe bros

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

Jeffrey Epstein was the inventor of “this could’ve been an email”

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

Let’s get lost tonight, you can be my Chinese Kate Moss tonight

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

This is what I told the hospital HR lady when they turned me down for a neurosurgeon position

[☔ @Whotfismick]

📌

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

@crybabybuick Same, I couldn’t walk for a year after mine

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

Damn girl, you don’t look a day over fast cars and freedom

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

Walgreens: “your prescription is ready for pickup”

Walgreens an hour later: “do you still need your prescription?”

Jesus Christ, gimme a fucking chance

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

Vaxxed?

[Pop Base @PopBase]

226 years ago today, George Washington passed away.

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

Say that you a lesbian, girl, me too

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

How about a mortgage that begins at conception and goes until you die?

[Reasonable Person @reasonableprsn]

Recession indicator?

[Carlisle @CarlisleDiana]

There was a 23 year old straight man working at Sephora today

[Karen McGee @karenmotherof2]

Burner twitter was way better when it was just dudes sticking fingers in their drinks