Genevieve Wocke

My hand is a dolphin.

[Genevieve Wocke @regemlauda]

I can't work tonight. Normally I'd just say I'm drunk but truthfully my back is killing me. And I'm drunk.

[Genevieve Wocke @regemlauda]

I wish I knew a guy with a condom.

[Genevieve Wocke @regemlauda]

Take off my heels? Communist Russia couldn't get me to take my heels off.

[Genevieve Wocke @regemlauda]

Dad just asked me if I'm nervous going back to work. I wasn't but now I am. #scaredshitless

[fathima @noodlesndoodles]

This comment thread made me laugh out loud! Good Monday morning fodder 😂

[UberFacts @UberFacts]

Immigrants are applying to become naturalized U.S. citizens at unprecedented rates so that they can vote against Donald Trump.