🤗

[Douglas A. Boneparth @dougboneparth]

How to prove you’re alive:

1. Make a public appearance

[I Smoked Lindsey Graham @BlackKnight10k]

Imagine being the Republican party and trying to hide the fact that one of your Senators died to avoid holding a special election and then a totally different Republican Senator died from karma

[Adam Rankin @rankintweets]

Every 3 years a new water bottle brand completely oneshots middle class white women like clockwork

[autist @litteralyme0]

Growing up hearing “Wikipedia isn't a valid source” and then entering a workplace where people say “just ask ChatGPT” is a surprisingly strange timeline

[Fav ⛧ @Favwontmiss]

Vaccines are so effective they created an entire generation of people who think the diseases they prevented weren’t a big deal.

[✧ 𝓢𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓮 ✧ @lostshine7]

Women are lonely, too. But people don’t care because lonely women don’t murder, they go to grad school or get a rescue dog.

[kk 🦋 @kkrespawned]

Honestly shocked that TMZ can’t figure out if McConnell is dead or not (he is). Why do we even have TMZ DC if not for this

[Mike Nellis @MikeNellis]

Call me old-fashioned, but I think the President of the United States should be able to remember the name of a nation he’s been bombing the shit out of for five months.

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

Hear me out…

Since we’re having such a hard time finding male candidates without a history of abuse, sexual assault, or rape maybe it’s time we started electing more women.

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

I hope everyone had a great 4th of July. I know @realDonaldTrump and family did.

250 years ago we declared independence from a king who ran the colonies as a family business. In just 18 months the Trumps have made King George look like an amateur.

A $620 million Pentagon loan, the largest in the program’s history, to a company Don Jr.’s firm bought into three months before.

An Air Force drone contract to a startup the princelings took public through a golf course company they own a piece of.

The Army’s largest drone motor order ever, to a company where Don Jr. sits on the board and holds millions in stock.

A $24 million Pentagon robotics contract to the company that employs Eric as Chief Strategy Advisor.

A stake in the largest undeveloped tungsten deposit on earth, in Kazakhstan, backed by $1.6 billion in US government support.

Jared’s fund seeded with $2 billion from the Saudi crown prince, now $6.2 billion, 99% of it foreign money from Gulf governments. Over $110 million in fees collected from the Saudis alone. He negotiates American foreign policy with the governments that pay him.

$2.3 billion from crypto ventures their father regulates. More than a million people bought in and lost $2.3 billion. The money didn’t grow. It simply moved from the subjects pockets to the crown’s coffers.

And the next one is already drafted. A proposed ATF rule that will allow guns to be shipped straight to your front door. The government’s own estimate is 3.3 million home gun deliveries a year. Don Jr. sits on the board of the online gun megastore built to cash in. He holds 300,000 shares.

And that’s only the fraction they’ve allowed us to see. Not one subpoena served. Not one search executed. Why hide anything when you own the investigators?

Me? They searched a laptop for six years. Federal prosecutors. Grand juries. Subpoena power. Congressional hearings. They found nothing. I made about $200k a year selling paintings when my Dad was President, and they made my paintings part of an impeachment inquiry.

For six years they’ve asked Where’s Hunter? What about the laptop?

Wrong questions. The right one is 250 years old. Does America belong to a family?

They’ve given their answer. Long live the King.

[BrooklynDad_Defiant!☮️ @mmpadellan]

It's weird to me how trump never lets go of a grudge, he still bitches about Obama, Biden, Hillary, and even Rosie O'Donnell for some reason.

He never says a word about any of the people who supposedly tried to assassinate him.

Nothing. Weird.

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

Anyone else remember being taught that America was a melting pot and that it was something to celebrate?

[MSG @TheGarden]

it’s a love story

[Empire State Building Observation Deck @EmpireStateBldg]

Her something blue 🩵

See tonight’s lights live: https://t.co/iavtXSm3Fx

Text CONNECT to 274-16 for real-time lighting alerts.

[𝕷𝖚𝖈𝖎𝖋𝖊𝖗 @LucifersTweetz]

It’s pretty fucking disgusting that we live in a country where climbing the Empire State Building is a crime but rich people touching little kids isn’t.

[🤗 @respirez]

@joeroganhq Incorrect. I live among the Amish. They are overweight and at the cancer center for treatment.

[𝕷𝖚𝖈𝖎𝖋𝖊𝖗 @LucifersTweetz]

If they’re putting religion in schools, we must demand the IRS be put in churches.

[‏ً @omgsidewalks]

I DO NOT think people understand that global warming doesn’t mean “no cold weather ever.” It means a warming planet destabilizes weather patterns, causing more extreme weather. This has been explained for decades and people still don’t get it.

[Fox News @FoxNews]

BREAKING: Two people have climbed to the top of the Empire State Building in New York City, holding a banner from the skyscraper's antenna reading, "When the power of love beats the love of power, the world knows peace."

As of now it's unclear how the pair reached the top of the building as police work to get them down from the spire, 1,454 feet above the ground.

[MP Arizona☀️🏳️‍🌈💙🌵🐕🐕‍🦺🫂💦🏜🐟🌴🎙🌎🌻♍️🌊 @AzPetrich]

Clarence Thomas argued the 14th Amendment was written narrowly for former enslaved people and doesn't apply broadly today. Using that same logic, the 2nd Amendment was written for muskets and doesn't apply to AR-15's, but somehow, he's never made that argument.