Lexi Rudner

I don’t know where’d I’d be without corndogs

[Joe @mojoejoejoemtz]

For the next stimulus check, you need to sell a certain amount of these chocolates to get it

[Quan ⋆ @Quan2Real_]

When my fam ask me what dish i brought, ima say “beef” & then swing on my cousin

[Alex @Crunkwbritney]

What is Joe Biden’s plan to Free Britney

[Lexi Rudner @rexiludner]

My back hurts so bad that I’d like what happens to the boyfriend at the end of classic horror film The Hitcher to happen to me. I think that would fix the problem 😩 #ifykyk

[Stephen Colbert @StephenAtHome]

The human body was not made to expend this much energy thinking about Pennsylvania.

[ACLU @ACLU]

STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE
STAY IN LINE

[Lexi Rudner @rexiludner]

I don’t need Election Day off, I need the day after to recuperate my mental state

[FUCKJIGGYJAYY2 @jiggyjayy2]

Election day not being a "holiday" is yet another crime against the working class.

[cindy kahn @cindykahn1]

DO NOT mail any more ballots. Carry them in or use a drop box. We are now 1 week away. Some of my mail has been taking 10 days from 8 miles away in FL.
Re-read this. Too late to use the mail. Make sure your vote counts!

[Dara McAnulty @NaturalistDara]

Seriously, why is wanting a fair, just and compassionate society which works for everyone and every living thing so radical?! I cannot fathom why we wouldn’t support those who need it, show kindness at every possible moment and value our living world 😔

[Lexi Rudner @rexiludner]

The fact that it’s snowing rn makes me sad... Where has this year gone???

[Popeyes @Popeyes]

It’s the "closed on Sundays" for me

[Lexi Rudner @rexiludner]

The apostrophe... I see it, you see it, we all see it ok please

[Lexi Rudner @rexiludner]

My cat’s both just ran over my foot with all 8 feet, claws out, going 210mph. I will never again feel bad for accidentally stepping on them

[Lexi Rudner @rexiludner]

You know that awkward moment when 45 year old women high five after they finish the Cupid shuffle? That’s all of 2020

[Kip Conlon @kipconlon]

Want to feel old? Pebbles Flintstone's been dead for 2 million years.

[PRENUP @djprenup]

Telling a basketball player to shut up and dribble but won’t tell a TV personality to shut and stop being president