jelise | wonderhoy !!!

yes im a hater and a gatekeeper. im also God’s favorite princess and the most interesting girl in the world | 19 | she/her | wlw

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

mfw the chef says yaoi isnt on the menu tonight

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

pleas pray i do not wake from my slumber. let me leave this earth./

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

give it like less than even a dya and i will shut myself in a hole of despair and isolation. letting my SUCK FUCKING ADDICTION CONTROL MY LIFE

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

https://t.co/y6zC7XsH13

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

the mor ei try tyo be normal to p[retend like this hasnt shifted my entire virw on life and reality and the purspose of living the WORSE IT GETS it comes back sdtronger with a vengannece now her ei am. 6;50 am, cannot sleep

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

evreyrtime i think i can indulge recreati0nally and not ghave it be a problem its always a problem it always consurmess me i cant sleep i cant thunk i canr do anythhing its always there. remindingf me,

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

ive been clean for so long i reallly really have. im like a dirty fucking crack addict i jsut canbnot help myelf

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

HONESYELYT im more dissapointed in myself beacuse i thought i had grown i thought i could enjoy things a normal amount like a functioning adult. i clearly forgor that i amNOT a fucntioning afult

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

i donmt thimk this is helping but i think i need to shout into the voide into the great internet ecpoanse because i have no mouth i simkley cnnot speak fo this and speak of it with the full sincerity my heart feels because im a FUCKING FREAK WEIRDO ABOMINATION OF CREATION

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

im so flads i decided tiwtter was needed. im bottling up all of this fucking autistic meltdown and i sweasr to god i was avbout to explose

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

and whats wors e is im alone in thi prison. no one else will ever ge7y it like i do. im just a frewk to othewrs. lets be honesty i am but like im TELLING YOU its mroe.

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

i do tihis to myelf. i really do. i need to loick myelf ina padded room. no influence from the outside world just me and china. i CAN NO T BE NORMAL! i cannot be trusted with it.

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

ots been like less than TWO DAYS. TOWE DAYS. hwo many times have i watched it? I CANT REMENBER !!!!!!!!!!! i wis h oh god i wish there was a way to cure autisdtm because jessus fucking christ i need one

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

im gonna cur off all my limbs and showve an icepick directly into my brain cavuity thru my eyeball socket and pray AND PRAY it will stop

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

my mind is a prison i woudlnt wish on abnother soul living or dead this is truly worse than anuy conceivabl tiyrture nmethod

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

ogh elise you should watch it everyones talking abotu it youll eb normal abour it your historically so good at ebing normal about thigns

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

this sint good for my mental healthand the scaru thing is i genuinely cannot twll my therapist id rather die but this cant be healthy i knew it would be a bad idea and yet i DID IT ANYWAY VBECAUS EI HAVE NO SELF CONTROL AND I HATE MYSELF APPARENTKY

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

"we didnt even kiss" how about i kiss a loaded shotgun how about i deepthroat it anfd fucjging pull the tiegger. how about I PAINT THE FDUCKING CEILING WITH MY BRAINMATTER HOW ABOUT THAT HUFH??????????????? YOU WANT THAT????? BECAUS EI DO!

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

2027. i think ill killnmyself before then its over im done,

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

OSMOMEBODY SEDATRE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[jelise | wonderhoy !!! @rib0fl4vin]

i gebnuinely cant sleep everytime i clowse my eyes im shakugn i hate being autistic this is hell