rich goodwin

i make everything
including jokes

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

Why do I get the feeling Besos is going to put a giant lazer on the moon and hold the earth ransom?

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

I could eat a whole pizza and I will.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

I have problems with my CDO.
It’s like OCD but the letters are in the correct order.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

I had a moment when cooking breakfast today that reminded me of a time in Europe when they put yogurt on a waffle. Then I got a bunch of targeted ads from yoghurt companies. Thanks secret FBI agent... you really get me. And oh yah, by the way did I mention I went to Europe?

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

I hate when people ask me what I do for fun. There’s no nice way to say finger bang your mom.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

My super power: I don’t need to be drunk to send embarrassing texts.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

@markmcmorris Get it bro!!!

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

@FightCIubs .

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

@itsjenIawrence how about a burrito?

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

@lovejourdan @Uber I think that's illegal. Next time just start ratchet snapping and see what happens.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

Don't call it a comeback I've been here for years.
#jacksonhole

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

@alispagnola 7 days

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

Wait... Was something happening in Mt Baker? I feel like there's a clue here somewhere.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

@KristiLeskinen I love all this mess you've stirred. What's next in @XGames? Iron chefing? Top modeling? Gamers have no business in xgames.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

I could have bought myself a house with all the heli-time I've used but never had to pay for.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

If you're a GoPro athlete an you haven't posted the new camera....
I'm ashamed of you.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

Perks of dating me...
You get to be the psycho.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

Let's get naked and Skype.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

Put a ring on it?... You'd be lucky to get your own ring TONE.

[rich goodwin @richiebeats]

Do you ever see an old photo of yourself and your first thought is, "where did that shirt go?"